Category: reader insert

The Forgotten Wife – Part 2

On By deathvalleyqueen666In fanfiction, negan/reader, reader insert, Series, The Forgotten Wife, The Walking Dead, WIPLeave a comment

Part 1

Part 2

The Market was the heart of the Sanctuary. Most people went through at least once a day. Among the workers it was the one little part of life that was enjoyable, just like the old world. Those with talents for crafting or math were often given charge of stalls to sell their wares or those items scavenged by others. Unlike many of the other workers you never found yourself getting lost in the old world commercialism, you were always too worried about never having enough points to get what you and Deacon needed to enjoy the frivolity of it all like some people did. This time however, despite your reservations about entering in this strange new agreement with Negan, you looked forward to being able to give Deacon whatever his heart wanted.

As you walked in the large, open room filled with tables and stalls you noticed that the lines were shorter than normal. Maybe it has something to do with what Gavin and Simon came to talk to Negan about.. You mused as you set Deacon down, urging him to stay close as you took his hand and walked towards the area where all the clothes available were hanging. Everyone was given the basics, a decent change of clean clothes when you arrived but beyond that it was all points, unless you fought for Negan or married him. Well, except us now… You mused nervously as you searched through the rack of women’s clothes till you came across a deep royal blue and forest green boho style patch work dress. It was so far from the black form fitting number that Negan used to make you wear and far more inline with your personal style before the world went to hell. With a small grin, to no one but yourself, you pulled the dress off the rack. Resting the dress across your free arm you started to make your way towards the shelves that housed the toddler sized clothes.

There were two shelves, side by side. One of used clothes, taken from homes the area, which you almost always picked from as they cost less points and to you it mattered far more than Deacon had warm clothes than good looking clothes. The other shelf, which was nearly twice as full, held all the pristine new clothes taken from mall nearly 10 miles from the Sanctuary. These were clothes that only the soldiers’ children were about to wear. Now as you reached up and pulled a pair of jeans down you could feel the other worker’s eyes burn into your soul. They all will know. That doubtful voice in your head, that sounded dangerously like your mother at times, called out silently. It’s not like you don’t know they whisper about him…about you… It called out again from the darkest corners of your mind.

Your eyes dart around the room, searching for a sign of your suspicions but find everyone busy with their own business. A small sigh of relief escapes your lips as your smile down at your son. Setting your dress and the pair of jeans down on the shelf for a moment you walk over to a stack of handmade baskets and pick one up, Deacon in tow the whole time. Walking back over to the shelf, you drop the basket to the floor before you pulled down the dress and jeans dropping into the basket. “Bubba,” You say softly to your son as you let go of his hand. “stay right here…I don’t want to see one toe move mister…” You say in a soft yet stern voice. The little boy gave you a quick nod before you turned back to the shelf and began to search through the clothes. Pulling anything in Deacon’s size that you thought was cute and toss it in the basket with the other clothes.

As the basket neared capacity you reached down and slipped it over your arm. As your turned around to take Deacon’s hand you spied Simon walking through the back entrance of the market place. “Great..” You groaned softly as you started to walk past the women’s clothes again. Spying a decent looking pair of jeans and a summery sky blue peasant top hanging next to each other you pulled them off the hangers without looking at the sizes and placed them on top of the basket. “Bubba…” You called to Deacon again glancing down at him, his hand gripping yours tightly, before finishing your journey to the ‘Check out’ area.

As you stood in the short line your eyes were fixed on Simon as he stopped to talk to several of the men standing guard. Even though he was speaking with the men, his dark eyes searched the room, no doubt looking for you. As the person in front of you moved aside you were still transfixed on tracking Simon’s movements and didn’t notice till the woman keeping track of the points called out. “(y/n), sweetheart are you ok?”. You shake your head as your are jarred from your thoughts.

“Shit..” you cursed taking a quick step forward, bringing Deacon with you. “I’m so sorry Mary…” You apologize as you set your basket up on the table. Mary was a kindly but very tired woman of about 65. In the old world she ran a small dress shop the next town over from where you grew up, she fitted and sold your prom dress. This world had been hard on her, she lost all of her family. One by one. Some from the virus in the start of all this, some to the dead and well the her son died in an early attack against the Saviors by another community. It wasn’t long before Deacon was born when it happened and in her own way Mary had taken you and your son under her wing. Helping you with what she could and always keeping Deacon with her in the market while you worked. She was Deacon’s ‘Memaw’ and she adored her ‘Bubba’ a nick name that she bestowed up on your son as an infant because he was a chubby baby. Now even you called him that (or some variation of it) quite often.

“Don’t worry about it, you look like you have had a good day though… all these clothes.” She noted with a little chuckle as she pulled each item of clothing out of the basket and marking it’s value on a scrap piece of paper. Having become so close to Mary and knowing her a bit from before, you had confided in her the truth about Deacon’s father being Negan not long after he was born. She kept your secret for all that time, helped you raise Deacon like her own grandchild even knowing who his father was. As she pulled out the new clothes, the ones too expensive for workers Mary let out a little gasp before quickly bringing her hand to her mouth trying to mask her shocked expression. “No..” She mumbled in a low voice.

“Go see Memaw…” You tell Deacon and the little boy smiled brightly before his hand slipped from yours and he raced around the table. Deacon crawled into her waiting lap as Mary gave your raven haired little boy a kiss on his chubby cheek.

Mary glared up at you with a look only a mother could give, “Don’t think you are going to distract me with him… you didn’t go back to him, did you?” She finished her sentence in a low voice as you glanced to see where Simon was. Thankfully he was stopped by some workers who needed him for some reason.

Guessing you had at least another few minutes you leaned down on the table. “Negan figured it out, well he had some fucking help.. but he knows. He said he is going to take care of me and Deacon…” You answer her softly a you reach across the table and push some of Deacon’s hair out of his eyes. “I don’t really know what to make of any of this or know what the hell will happen now.” Mary gave a little nod and you could tell she too was troubled by this situation.

Putting her hands over Deacon’s ears, she leaned forward and gave her take on the situation. “Well he fucking better, he made you feel worthless and did nothing but grunt on top of you till he put this little angel in your belly. Made you so afraid of him that you ran, tail between your legs pregnant, scared and alone… oh I would love to give him a piece of my mind..:” You held back the urge to roll your eyes but you did shake your head at her comments. She pulled her hands away from Deacon’s ears and kissed the top of his head.

Mary was about to continue going on about one thing or another but you put your hand up, spotting finally making a path straight towards you. “Just mark the points Mary…” Your heart races, Simon always made you nervous. You beckoned Deacon back to you silently as Simon reached ear shot.

He had a fake smile plastered across his face but his tense body langue told you he was upset about whatever had transpired with Negan. He swaggered over to the table, his thumbs hooked into his belt loops on his jeans as he stopped next to the table, his eyes glance first at the pile of clothes that Mary was finishing tallying up and placing back into the basket and then to you. His lips twisted into a genuine smirk when he saw you grip Deacon’s shoulder’s tighter. “Well, I see you follow instructions well still..” Simon noted with a dark chuckle. “When you are ready… he is..”

You gave a small nod and leaned forward picking up the basket up from Mary’s table. The white haired woman placed her hand over yours as you gripped the basket. “Don’t forget about that Fire Truck that Deacon always likes to play with…” Mary said loud enough for Simon to take notice and glance over at the stall next to Mary’s where an middle aged man named Ian crafted wooden toys for the children of the Sanctuary. Simon turned around and picked the medium sized red wooden toy off the table and took a few steps over to Deacon.

Leaning down, in a rare moment of humanity, Simon smiled and handed it Deacon who gazed wide eyed up at him as his small arms wrapped around the toy as large smile spread across his face. “Here you go buddy…” Simon chuckled softly as he took a step back and glanced up at you. “Even with the end of the world… every little boy loves a good fire truck.” He seemed somewhat relaxed by seeing Deacon’s joy, letting out a heavy sigh he almost started speak once more but stopped himself. Ending up only clearing his throat.

Leaning down you whispered in Deacon’s ear. “Say thank you to Simon…”

Simon’s eyes fixed on Deacon as the little boy took a few steps over to him and looked up at him with his wide hazel eyes. “sank ju…” Deacon said joyfully as he held up his fire truck. You couldn’t help but smile brightly as Simon reached down and tussled the toddler’s dark hair.

“You are very welcome young man…” Simon glanced up at you, when he saw the large smile spread across your face and your eyes lighting up seeing your little boy’s joy, his eyes became transfixed on you. Simon had his moments where he seemed like a decent sort of guy, not unlike the men you grew up around. Rough around the edges but with a soft gooey center. Other times though, he scared you half to death. He was Negan’s right hand man from way back, even in your early days as a wife. Back then he was the only person to have been kind to you when you married Negan, scared and alone in this world. There were moments where you wondered if being his wife would be better or worse than being Negan’s.

As you lifted the basked off the table and walked towards Simon you turned back for a moment and smiled at Mary. “I will come talk to you tonight, after Bubba is asleep Mama Mary..” She gave you a little nod and blew Deacon a kiss.

“I love you my sweet boy!” She called to Deacon as she waved to him.

Deacon smiled back and in his sweet little voice exclaimed “Lub ju Memaw…” with a bright smile running across his lips as he attempted to still hold onto his fire truck, which seemed massive in his little arms, and wave goodbye at the same time.

You spied a soft smile playing on Simon’s face as he watched the exchange between Mary and Deacon, as you walked up next to him. Much to your surprise he stretched out his arm, “Let me,” He said almost gentlemen like, as he took the full basket of clothes from your arms not waiting for you to answer.

“Thank you,” You utter softly as you reach down and place a gentle hand on your son’s shoulder urging him forward as Simon started to lead the way back out of the marketplace.

Simon walked in silence for a time, occasionally looking over at you like he was going to start a conversation but always stopping himself short. As much as you had seen Simon around over the years you knew little about his life before all this. Some of the people talked about nothing but the old world, some people never said a syllable about their old life. “Did you know Mary was a seamstress, before all this?” You finally asked Simon, wanting to break the uncomfortable silence on the long walk back to Negan’s room.

Simon gave a little, half hearted nod like he almost didn’t want to admit to the knowledge. “Yeah…” He said simply before glancing over at you. “What did you do?” He asked.

You smile nervously slightly embarrassed of the job you had before all this. “I worked at the Kitty Kat Klub…” You mumbled, you cheeks flushing. The Kitty Kat Klub was the local strip club a few towns over. It was about as classy as a rural strip club that catered to farmers and truckers could get, but anyone who lived anywhere within 50 miles knew of it. Simon raised a suspicious eyebrow at you answer and it only caused your cheeks to grow more crimson. “I was one of the bar tenders… don’t get your fucking hopes up… I can’t dance to save my life.”

Simon let out a hearty chuckle as he shook his head. “Well, I would have never expected that… not in a million years.” Your cheeks were still flushed red and you grateful on some level that Deacon had little idea of what you two were talking about.

“Well, I worked in assisted living group home during the day, but it was shit money and only part time. I had bills…” You admitted though you knew that you had no reason what so ever to justify the actions of your past life to Simon, you still couldn’t abide people having the wrong impression of you. “What about you?” Tilting you head slightly to the side as you spoke.

Simon chuckled and shook his head. “Just a normal guy… work… life…” His vagueness didn’t deterred you. Take a step sideways, positioning yourself next Simon, so you didn’t have to speak so loudly, you smile at him.

“Well, did you have a family?” Simon glanced at you as he spoke, there was a great deal of pain behind his eyes as he gave a quick nod before glancing down at Deacon who was totting along, spinning one of the wheels happily. I bet he had a little boy, it would explain so much…I am so fucking blind… shit.. You silently scold yourself. “I’m sorry.” You say barely audible.

Simon shook his head slowly as he began. “Everyone has lost people these days, (y/n), if you let yourself die with them… living constantly in memories of the dead you will die too.” His words cut into your soul, and for a brief moment you gazed up at Simon with reverence in your eyes. He had so much more to him than his creepy advances and his quick temper. There was a certain intelligence to the way he spoke, that was something you had always noticed. He was educated but chose not show it more often than not. The more you interacted with him the more of mystery he became to you.

“That’s true…” You say nodding your head as you round the last corner before Negan’s rooms. Stopping for a moment you reached out and placed a tender touch on Simon’s arm. “But if the past didn’t matter… why tell Negan?” You asked bluntly as you reached out and touched his muscular arm again.

Simon looked away for a brief moment, his eyes fixated on the door to Negan’s room before glancing back down at you. “Because I know what it’s like to have your child hidden from you…right under your nose…and not know before it was too late.” As he spoke your face dropped and there was part of you that felt horrible for Simon and wondered what happened but knew it was not your place to press the issue. “I saw you struggling to take care of the boy..” Simon said in a low tone leaning in and handing you back the basket as he spoke. “I am sure you have you reasons and they are probably damn good reasons too.” His eyes lock on yours as he speaks, his gaze causing you heart to quicken. “but the kid deserves a chance to know his father…and you both deserve a better life..” His words sent a strange chill down your spine. Who does he think can give us this better life truly… I doubt he thinks it’s Negan… You muse as Simon’s hand brushes your lower back as he ushered you toward the door not giving you a moment’s chance to respond to his comment.

As Simon pushed open the heavy door your eyes went right to Negan, who stood by the window carefully overseeing some of the workers preparing to leave the compound. Simon cleared his throat and Negan quickly turned around. His eyes went straight towards Deacon clutching his new toy. A smiled crept across his face as he made his way towards you and Deacon. Simon leaned in and whispered. “You deserve the fucking world don’t settle for less.” His words only confirmed your previous gut feeling about Simon’s intentions. You smiled softly at him.

“Thank you Simon…” You said softly, as you reached over, your finger tips brushing his bare forearm.

Simon smirked at your touch, “Any time sweetheart,” he said with a small chuckle before glancing over at Negan who was standing watching the small exchange between you and Simon with a slightly sour look on his face. “Anything else boss?” He asked in a light hearted tone which Negan found none to amusing.

Negan shook his head and reached down to rest his hand on Deacon’s shoulder. “No…” Negan said in a dark tone. If you didn’t know better you would have almost guessed Negan was jealous of the small bit of affection you had shown Simon. No, there is no way Negan would be jealous of Simon. I am not Negan’s wife any more. Your eyes darted between the two men. Tension was thick in the air as Simon stood almost staring Negan down.

As he went to leave Simon turned back to you, “I’ll be around if you need help later.” He made sure his words were loud enough for Negan to hear.

“I am sure we can manage Simon,” Negan responded back quickly. You took a step away from Simon, feeling the tension rise.

Taking a deep breath you move towards Deacon who was standing in front of Negan. “It’s a nice offer but Negan is right, we can mange.” You say in a calm tone trying to do your best to calm the situation. Simon gave you a worried looked but you just gave him a quick nod, and with that he turned and left. Letting the heavy door slam shut with a loud bang.

Negan rolled his eyes and let out a heavy sigh as he looked at you, his gaze instantly making you nervous. “Is there something going on between you two I should be fucking aware of?” Negan asked quickly and sharply. You quickly shook your head. “It doesn’t look that way from where I am fucking standing…” He said in a low voice.

“Nothing is going on… not that it is any of your business if there was.” You respond sharply setting the basket that was growing heavy in your arms on a nearby chair. As you turn around and place your hands on your hips. “What is it you used to tell us wives… What goes on when you’re not here ain’t your business…” Using his own words against him caused Negan to huff softly as he shook his head.

“Well fucking played.” He conceded as he sat down on the large black couch. “But… since you are the mother of my only child… who you spend your time with. Who my son is around… Is my fucking business now.” Negan leaned back on the couch, his long arms stretched across the back of the couch. “Come here buddy,” Negan called to the toddler who turned around, still a little unsure of Negan. He took a little step forward and held out his fire truck showing it to his father.

“Uck!” Deacon exclaimed as he placed the fire truck in Negan’s lap and patted his father’s knee excitedly. “uck! Uck!” he repeated, each time his little hand made contact with his father’s knee. Negan smirked and leaned forward slightly picking the wooden toy up.

“Truck…” Negan said slowly. “TR…uck” Deacon looked confused and made the same face that you had seen spread across Negan’s face a thousand times, that deep solemn frown. The how dare you tell me I am wrong face. Negan noticed it too and tried to stifle a chuckle. “That face…” He started as he looked up at you with a little smile playing on his lips almost like that tense moment hadn’t happened. “shit, he is my kid… that is more fucking proof that a DNA test…” You nodded slowly as you watched Deacon crawl up on to the couch next to Negan, his little legs kicking frantically as he tried to pull himself up.

Deacon slid back off the couch unable to get up on his own, frustrated he looked up at Negan and demanded “Halp” as he threw his arms up. Negan leaned forward and picked Deacon up helping him get up on the couch next to him. Once up on the couch Deacon reached over and picked up his truck showing it to Negan again. “Uck…” He said with a little smirk and Negan just shook his head as Deacon started to play with the truck quietly.

Standing across the coffee table, leaning back against the chair with your basket of clothes resting on the seat you smiled. “The fire truck made his day…” Negan looked up and smiled softly at your comment.

“Good..” He said simply as he leaned back watching Deacon play next to him out of the corner of his eye for a few seconds before eyeing the basket of clothes in the chair. “See you found clothes…” He was trying to be pleasant, but you could tell that Negan was still somewhat annoyed with the whole exchange with Simon.

“Thank you,” You respond quickly remembering that he always liked to be thanked for his ‘kindness’. His gaze was fixed on you as you stood wringing you hands nervously, unsure of what your place in this moment was.

Negan’s tongue darted across his lips, something that you didn’t think would still send a delightful tingle down your spine but, it did. He motioned for you to sit and without him needing to utter a sound you picked the basket up, set it on the floor and sat down in the chair. All in one quick movement, your eyes wide and darting between Negan and your son. Letting a out barely audible huff Negan settled back in on the corner of the couch. “You look little red riding hood trapped in a room with the big bad wolf..”  He said with a tone of dark humor in his voice.

You scoff softly and suppress the intense urge to roll your eyes. “Isn’t that your thing though… Negan is the big bad… so give me half your shit and fall the fuck in line.” Negan almost looked surprised at your defiant tone, but you had heard the workers talk. You had few friends left beyond Mary, but you listened to all the conversations people had. The workers feared Negan, with more than enough reason.  “If that is not the persona that you want to put out there you need reevaluate how you handle shit…” You swallow hard knowing that what you had just said more than likely hit a nerve with the father of your child but after all this time you needed to get it off your chest.

Negan gave a shrug and a little laugh. “Well it’s not a bad reputation to have…” He mused tilting his head to the side and raising an eyebrow as you shook your head disagreeing with him.

“It is the worst kind to have. Yeah people fear you but that rarely works out well long term if my memory of history class serves me well.” Bringing your hand to your face you pinch the bridge of your nose and take a deep breath. “You said you wanted to know if anything was going on between me and Simon…which there isn’t…” you start slowly,  “because you wanted know who you son was around.” Letting out a heavy sigh as your pull your hand away and stare Negan straight in the eyes. “Maybe look in the mirror and look at the type of man that wants to try and come in and start dictating how I raise my son…” Deacon looked up from his play and straight at you as he heard the tone in your voice grow with anger. It was something he rarely heard from you.

Negan went to speak but this time you put your hand up. “No, fuck no…” You said frustrated. “I am trying to raise a good kid. With some kindness in his heart in this fucked up work… and Simon was kind to me, kind to you son today… so I was kind to him and what you got jealous or some shit…” You put your hands up as you shake your head completely frustrated with Negan in that moment. “Which if you are jealous then that’s your problem because if you taking care of your son comes with trappings of being your wife again then just forget about us… really because I can’t live like that.” You sunk back into the chair and covered your face with your hands not wanting to see Negan’s reaction.

You guessed he was going to be angry but when there was a long silence and you heard Negan stand up from the couch. His boots hitting the concrete floor as he walked over and pulled your hands off your face forcing you to look up at him. “You’re right.” He said simply. “You’re not my wife any more…” His hand slipped away from you face as he took a step back and watched as Deacon went back to playing though he would occasionally stop and glance at you. “I fucked that up and I don’t remember how to be quite honest.” He turned back to you and held out his hand. “I am not asking you to give me a second chance with you, but let me have a chance with my son…” You couldn’t argue with his point, Deacon needed a father and he was lucky enough to still have his around.

Taking his hand you give him a little nod, “I will do my best.” You say with a small smile and Negan gave you a little nod as his large, rough hand slipped from yours.

“Well that’s a fucking start.” Negan said with a little laugh before joining Deacon on the couch. You watched from afar as Negan joined his son in playing with the fire truck. Negan made promises of more toys for him to play with in the morning and that made Deacon the happiest that you had ever seen him. Nothing but laughter and joy came from your son’s lips that evening while he played with his father.

Negan had dinner brought in for the three of your, it was quite and pleasant as far as meals go. Deacon sat between you and Negan doing his best to get the spaghetti into his mouth with is fork but before you had a chance to help him Negan had already leaned in and switched his fork out for a spoon. He really is a good dad, why couldn’t he be a shit dad. One that really didn’t take the fucking time… It was such a storm of conflicting emotions in your mind all through the night.

After dinner Negan suggested watching a movie with Deacon and when you told him Deacon had never seen a movie or even tv Negan proclaimed “Well it’s about time, and it’s a first I can be there for..” He pulled out a dvd copy of the old Disney animations version of Robin Hood and placed it in the dvd player as he turned on the tv. Deacon was playing with his beloved fire truck on the floor near the couch and one the menu popped up Negan turned around and scooped the little boy up. “Come on buddy, we are gonna watch a movie…” He said with a cheerful tone in his voice as he set Deacon down on the couch and joined him. “Come on (y/n)… let’s play happy fucking family…”

“Alright..” You say softly as you pile the dinner plates together and brush your hands off on your jeans. Slowly you walked over to the couch and sat down next to Deacon. Negan’s arm rested along the back of the couch, his finger tips brushing against the back of your neck as you settled in as the movie started.

Neither one of you said much during the movie, you both were transfixed on Deacon’s wide eyed and enthusiastic expressions as he watched the first parts of the movie. Nearly 30 minutes into the film though you watched as your little boy hunkered in next to his father. Deacon let out a little yawn as he rested his head against Negan’s white cotton t-shirt clad chest as he started to fall to sleep. Negan wrapped his arm around him and kissed the top of his head. It was such a sweet moment that you couldn’t help but smile watching it unfold.

Once Deacon was fast asleep you looked over at Negan, who for the first time was holding his sleeping son in his arms, and he looked so at peace. “I’m glad he seems to have taken to you so well…” You say softly as you lean back against the opposite arm of the couch from Negan.

He smiled softly and let out a hushed chuckle. “I was worried to be quite fucking honest,” You didn’t want to admit it but you had your own fears. “This was more than hoped for…” He said nodding towards the sleeping boy in his arms.

The smile on your lips grows. “Deacon is a cuddle bug.” Negan smirked as you scooted closer so you wouldn’t have to speak so loudly. “When he was a baby, I couldn’t put him down… at all.” You leaned down and placed a kiss on your sleeping son’s cheek before sitting back up. “Everywhere I went I carried him in this sling Mama Mary made me out of some curtains or something… but he was a fussy baby, worried me a lot.”

“Mama Mary?” Negan asked softly raising an eyebrow.

“Mary, the little old lady that keeps track of the clothing… she used to have a dress shop about 15 minutes from here..” You explain and as you mention the dress shop there was something that rattled free and Negan seemed to recall who you were referring to.

“Her shop had some nursery rhyme type fucking name right?” He asked obviously recalling a long forgotten memory. You nod a little.

“Mary’s Garden..” You said softly and Negan gave a firm nod in return.

“My wife got her bridesmaids dresses there… they were fucking hideous, well so were the bridesmaids.” He said with a dark laugh and you couldn’t help but chuckle. It was rare that Negan spoke of his wife, Lucille, you only know only knew her name because he would moan it when he was fucking you and then apologize always saying you look like her.. his voice rang out in your mind.

Shaking you head a little from your own memories you reached out and touched Deacon’s back. “I really should get him into bed,” You went to pick him but Negan shook his head.

“Please…” He asked almost begging and you gave him a silent nod of approval. He smiled back to you softly. “I hope you don’t mind… but I did have some of the guys set up a better room for you and Deacon…”

You let out a half chuckle half sigh as you stood up pick up Deacon’s fire truck and walking over the basket full of clothes still sitting undisturbed on the floor next to the chair. “And you had them bring our things up…” You finished looked back as Negan stood up, Deacon’s head resting on his shoulder as his father carried him.

“You know me so well darlin’… are you sure you don’t want to give this marriage thing another go?” He said in a joking tone but still you rolled your eyes and shook your head as you went to open the door. “Give me time… I’ll work some magic on ya yet..” He teases walking through the door first leading the way.

“Get in line..” You quip back as you close the door slowly making sure not to let it slam and wake your sleeping son. Negan chuckled at your comment causing Deacon to stir and you instinctively shh him.

“Did you just fucking shh me?” Negan asked softly with another chuckle which made Deacon stir again.

Your eyes grew wide as you stood with Deacon’s fire truck tucked under one arm and the basket, growing heavy, in the other. “Can save the arguments for after you showed us where we live now please…before he wakes up.” You nod with you head towards Deacon.

Negan nods and starts walking down the hall to a room only a few doors down from his. “I know it’s close, but it was one of the few open rooms with enough space…” Negan explain as you went to open the door. Negan flipped the light switch and let out a small sigh of relief when he saw it was good order.

It was a decent sized room, with another room attached off to the side. “You have your own space…” Negan said as he set Deacon down in the crib located just outside the door that led into your bed room. Everything was set up like a little home. It was better than you could have ever hoped for. There was a small kitchen, a fridge, even a few toys already in a toy box near the crib where your son now slept. “I left the finer points of decoration up to you but the basics are here… there should be food in the fridge.” Negan explained as you stood with the basket in your arms in awe of it all.

“Thank you, this is really lovely Negan..”  you said softly setting the basket on a small end table. It wasn’t anything fancy by old world standards but it was a vast improvement than where you lived before.

Negan looked at you and smiled softly as he walked back over to the crib where Deacon slept and ran his hand along his son’s cheek. “It’s nothing.” He said softly as he turned around and walked back towards you. He placed a gentle hand on your shoulder as he began to speak once more. “Just worry about taking care of him, he is all that matters now.” Negan’s words tugged at your heartstrings and made your cheeks flush slightly.

Taking a deep breath he leaned in and gave you a nervous peck on the cheek. “Goodnight, (y/n).”

The feeling of his lips against the soft skin of your cheek was something you have never felt before. Even during his late night visit he rarely kissed your lips and nothing so tender as a peck to the cheek. You could feel your cheeks flush slightly as he moved towards the door. “Goodnight, Negan… see you in the morning.” You wave a little nervously as he walks out the door closing it as quietly as he possibly could on his way out.

Letting out a heavy sigh you mumbled, “What a fucking day..” As you picked up the basket of clothes off the end table and walked into your bedroom. It had a rare Queen sized bed, dressers and even a small vanity. Which made you chuckle. “This was better than my room as his wife… thanks bubba..” you giggled setting the basket on the dresser.

Pulling one of the drawers open you find a light blue summer night dress neatly folded laying alone in the drawer like someone had placed it there for you to find. Picking it up you felt the soft silk against you skin. Pulling off you dirty tank top and pushing your jeans down as you kicked of you boots you pulled the silk night dress over your now naked frame. It had been since you were Negan’s wife that you felt silk against your skin and you hated to admit the fact that you missed it.

There was a soft knock on the door to the main room. Looking around you had hoped whomever left you the night gown also thought to leave you a robe. Pulling back the door to the bedroom as the second soft knock echoed through the rooms, you found a deep navy bath robe and slipped it on. As you walked to open the door you quickly tied it shut. “Who the fuck could it be now…” You mummer as you turn the door knob and pull open the door.

Standing before you, leaning against the door frame holding a bottle of rum in one hand and two glasses in the other was Simon, with small smirk playing on his lips. “Fancy a drink?” He said wiggling the bottle of rum in his hand and after the day you had, you could really use a stiff drink. You usher him in and he smiled like the cat the got the canary as he walked trough the door. “Now I am gin man personally… but I will make an exception for a good rum and a little birdie…”

“Mary…” You quickly pointed out knowing that no one else would know that kind of information about you.

“Yes Mary…” He said with quite chuckle. “Told me rum is your favorite…and you while beautiful, look like a woman who needs a drink… and maybe a good fuck?” He said with a laugh to mask the more than likely serious offer of sex. It made you laugh and you grabbed his arm and started to pull him towards the bedroom making him get a little excited. “Well fuck… I was joking sweetheart but if you really want to, I will make that sacrifice…” His dark eyes roamed up and down your bathrobe covered frame and you just shook your head as you pulled him into the bedroom and pushed the door almost shut.

“Deacon is asleep…” You said sharply as Simon set the two glasses on the dresser and poured you both a drink.

“Sorry… got my fucking hopes up a little bit there…” He said in a kind tone as he handed you your drink. “To getting a life you deserve…” He said as he lifted his glass. You raised yours to meet his and touched the two glasses together before you downed the entire glass in one swig causing Simon to chuckle. “Oh where have you been all my life.”

“Five miles down the road from here…” You said with a little laugh. Simon made you laugh, more than Negan ever did. His eyes lit up as you chuckled at his jokes that night. There was nothing but a few drinks and Simon trying to lighten the mood for you both. After 3 drinks you both sat on the end of your bed.

Empty glass in hand and you turned to Simon let you a long sigh. The alcohol had made you bold enough to ask him something you had wanted to know all day and you had hoped that Simon being more than a few drinks in would answer you. “Simon…” You started slowly.

“Yes my darling girl..” He said with a flirtatious smirk.

“What happened today… when you came in with Gavin?” You asked softly almost a little nervous to learn the answer.

Simon groaned and fell back on to your bed. He brought his hands to his face as he spoke. “They slaughtered them all… all gone darling… killed…wiped the fuck out…” You turned around and laid down on the bed on your stomach and looked at him with a worried look painted across your face.

“What you mean Simon?” You ask nervously as you pick up on of his hands from his face so he could look at you when he finally answered.

“Some group attacked us… killed our people…” The words scared you in a way out didn’t know you could be afraid as your processed what that meant. You had always figured it was a matter of time before something happened, Negan pissed off the wrong people and there would be causalities. Simon could see the panic growing on your face and reached out, wrapping his arms around you, pulling you close to him. “Don’t you fucking worry darlin’…” He said softly looked down at you, his eyes slightly glazed from the alcohol. “I am never…ever gonna let these fuckers hurt you or that baby… I’ll kill them all, one by fucking one before they even get a chance to have an idea..” His tone was low and dark but in that moment, in the low light, late at night. The idea that Simon would kill to keep you and Deacon safe seemed the most romantic thing anyone could have said to you in that moment. You wrapped your arms around Simon and just smiled softly against his chest.

You didn’t say anything more, you didn’t do anything more, but that night you and Simon feel asleep in each other’s arms. It was the first time in as long as you can remember when you didn’t go to bed afraid of what would happen in the night.

The Forgotten Wife

On By deathvalleyqueen666In fanfiction, negan/reader, reader insert, Series, The Forgotten Wife, WIPLeave a comment

Part One

Prompt fill request from an Anon (on Tumblr):
I have a small idea about Negan’s less than favorite wife finds out she’s expecting and she think Negan will hurt her if found out so she opts out of being a wife and Negan is fine with it and doesn’t give it a second thought and let’s her work for points again and she seems to disappear-but he finds out the truth when Simon makes a comment about how much the former wife’s kid looks like him maybe when theyre eating in the cafeteria?

It was funny how quickly everyone seemed to forget your name and who you once were when you just became another worker. It was a blissful ambiguity that you had come to enjoy in the last two and half years since you stopped being Negan’s wife. You were no Amber or Frankie, you were just one of the rare women who actually thought you could get Negan to love you by marrying him. In the life before you had a type, the rough around the edges type of guy. The ones with bad tempers and foul moods. In your mind you thought you could fix them, that your love would save them from themselves. Negan was no different in your mind but he was. Your exs didn’t have a half dozen other wives to chose from and he barely seemed to remember your name back then.

He would come into your room, have his way with you however he so wished and then just leave. He never had a kind word, glance or touch for you. He did his “duty” and that was all. When you discovered about six months into your “marriage” with Negan that you were pregnant nothing but sheer panic filled your body. There were a thousand worse case scenarios running through your head in the days after you had your first suspicions. It was not long before you came to the only safe option, you would ask Negan to work for points again and hide in plain sight.

Negan didn’t care in the slightest when you left. Or the dozens of times he walked past you in the gardens while you were working while pregnant. Or even when he walked past you and his son in your arms in the hall every day. He had forgotten about you and that was the best thing you thought that could have ever happened.

It was almost two full years after the birth of your son before there was even the slightest sign that anyone suspected anything, and it wasn’t even Negan. Everyday while you ate your dinner with your son, Deacon, in your lap Simon watched your little boy intently. Simon was nice enough to you over the years, one of the few who remembered that you were once the less than cherished bride of their fearless leader.

Your attention was peaked particularly on this day as you noticed Negan perched over Simon’s shoulder. Your gaze was fixed on Simon’s lips as you tried desperately to make out what he was uttering to your former husband but he had tilted his head just enough so you couldn’t make out what he was saying. That same sense of panic that you experienced during the early days of your pregnancy came back in a tidal wave of fear and panic. “Come on bubs..” You mutter to your son as you take a napkin and wipe the food from his face and set him down on the bench before standing up.

As you leaned down to pick Deacon up, his small arms draping over your neck, you noticed Negan’s gaze lock on you as he leaned in whispered something to Simon before turning away and disappearing down the hall. Your pulse raced as you lifted your son up and tried to hurry away. Simon quickly moved to block your path as you went to exit the dinning hall. “Well (y/n), how are things going for you sweetheart?” Simon asked with a coy smile as he blocked the doorway with his arm.

You shrugged nervously sifting Deacon’s weight on your hip. “Fine, thank you Simon for asking…” You say quickly trying to muster all the energy you had within you to mask the feeling of panic growing in the pit of your stomach.

Simon gave a little nod and leaned into to look at Deacon who was gazing wide eyed at the strange man with his large hazel eyes, Negan’s eyes, you mind screamed in panic. As Simon leaned back he smirked. “That’s a very handsome little man you have there…”

“That’s very kind of you to say, thank  you…” Your voice was hiding less and less of your real emotions with each passing moment and Simon could see it, everyone could. He moved his arm from it’s position blocking the door to around your shoulder. You knew in your soul that this meant nothing good for you or Deacon.

Simon loomed over your shoulder as he leaned in and whispered, “I’m not the only who noticed your boy…” Simon’s voice was low, dark and sent a shiver down your spine. “Negan wants to see you… and the boy… in his private rooms.” Your heart felt like it was going to burst forth from your chest it was pounding so hard. Your grip on your son’s small frame tightened.

“Okay..” You choke out and Simon gives a dark chuckle as he ushers you and Deacon down a path that you hadn’t walked in years. Though it had been years since you were summoned to Negan’s private rooms, you still had the route etched forever in your mind.

With each silent step you thought of a new horror that Negan was going to subject you too upon realizing that you had hidden his only child, his first born son, under his nose for two full years. Deacon did look remarkably like his father, it was still a shock to you that no one had noticed it before. As you stood outside the large doors you leaned in and kissed your son on his cheek. “Just stay with mama, don’t let go of my hand…” You say calmly as you set Deacon down on the grey cement floor on his uneasy feet. His small hand clutching yours tightly and Simon pushed the door open.

Negan sat on the large black couch, Lucille leaning up against the arm of the sofa, his arm draped along the back. He wasn’t looking at your face as your walked in. His eyes were locked on the face of his son. “Thank you Simon… you may go…” Negan’s voice was calm, eerily calm, as he gave his orders. Once the doors closed Negan stood up and took a few steps forward.

Deacon looked up at Negan, his grip on your hand tightens as he tries to hide behind you as Negan finally stands just little more than a foot or two from where you stood. He leans forward and almost instantly you feel the way you felt back when you wore that black dress. “(y/n)… it’s been what… a little over two years since you made the choice to work like a fucking peasant…” Your eyes instantly focus on Deacon’s hand in yours as Negan continues, not waiting for you to answer. “Your boy… he is what… two…just about.” You nod nervously as Negan leans in, his hand grips your face forcing you to meet his gaze. “Now fucking tell me this…” He said in a very dark tone. “Is he mine… or where you a cheating whore…” His grip on your face tightened as he waited for your answer.

Deacon let go of your hand and went over to Negan, balling his tiny hands into fists and started pounding them on Negan’s leg. “NO!” the little boy yelled with all his might obviously upset at your treatment, before you even had a chance to answer. Negan’s hand slipped away from your face as you lunged down and scooped your son into your arms before stumbling back. Falling to the floor with a loud thud.

“Don’t hurt him… he didn’t ask to be born…” You say as you wrap your body around your son instinctively to protect your child. “He is yours… okay. Just don’t hurt him…” You sob, gazing up at Negan who had his hands balled into fists at his side. His face twisted into a snarl as he processed the information that you had just confirmed for him. He took a step forward in anger but stopped when Deacon let out small yelp of fear as the little boy hid in your arms.

Negan looked down at you for a moment still visibly upset and for the first time you noticed a few tears welling up in the corner of his eyes as he contemplated his next move. He kept looking down at Deacon, who was now clutching your arm and peering up at Negan with so much fear in his eyes it broke your heart. “I’m not gonna fucking hurt my boy…” Negan said softly, his voice shaking a little as he leaned down and offered you his hand to help you up. “I promise…” You take his hand nervously, Deacon scooted off and pushed himself as Negan helped you back to your feet. It was the first real kindness he had shown you.

Negan stared at you, his dark eyes ripping a path straight to your soul as he quietly said, “He is my son… you hid him from me…” His voice shook with some level of pain as he glanced down at Deacon who was clutching hand. “I don’t even know his name…” He seemed genuinely pained by this.

“Deacon..” You mumbled softly before leaning down and kissing your son’s mess of shaggy dark hair. “Bubba…” You said softly cupping his cheek. “This is your Daddy…” Deacon glanced up at Negan wide eyed and slightly confused.

Negan leaned down to look his son in the eye. He reached out to take his hand but Deacon pulled away. “Hey now little man…” Negan started. “I know I was mean to Mama…” Glancing up at your for a moment before turning back to your son. “I’m sorry that I scared you… but I won’t ever do that again…” Deacon looked up at you, unsure of what to do. You gave him a little nod reassuring him that it was ok.

Slowly Deacon’s hand slipped away from yours as he took an uneasy step forward towards his father. Negan stretched out his arms and picked the toddler up. He beamed at Deacon as he held his son in his arms for the first time. “You are a handsome little devil…” Negan playfully tickled Deacon’s belly which caused the little boy to let out a sweet chorus of laughter that calmed your nerves for the moment. Negan gazed at his son before looking over in your direction.

He let out a small chuckle, “We tried for years to have kids…” He confided to you in a moment of honesty. “The doctors told my wife it just wasn’t gonna be in the cards for us.” He leaned in and kissed the side of Deacon’s head as Deacon wrapped his arm around Negan’s neck. A tender smile crossed his lips as he continued. “I always wanted this…”

You were genuinely taken aback by his candor and tone as he held your son in his arms relishing in the moment and the little boys surprising show of affection. “I’m sorry Negan… You seemed like you hated me.” You confess softly returning his honesty with some of your own. “I was scared you wouldn’t want my child…” Your voice shakes as your confess your fears and watched as Negan’s face grew solemn with guilt.

He opened his mouth to speak but stopped, reaching out he placed his hand on your shoulder and pulled you into hug. You hand slipped around Deacon’s back as you rested your head against Negan’s chest. “I’m fucking sorry… I had no clue you felt like that. I never hated you. I barely fucking knew you (y/n).” He gave a small shrug as you pulled back still fairly uncomfortable with his touch.

“You didn’t try to know me either…” You muttered softly take as step back, you hand lingering for a moment on Deacon’s back. Biting your bottom lip as you felt a sense of guilt for your part in this sorted tale. “Never the less..” You start taking a long deep breath. “I shouldn’t have kept the baby from you.”

Negan gave you a quite nod before turning his attention back to the child you shared. “Well, I guess I have some time to make up for don’t I?” He asked Deacon with a little smirk.

The toddler shrugged as Negan bounced him in his arms. Deacon looked fairly confused by the whole situation as you would expect given the events that transpired but there was part of you, finally seeing Negan holding your son. That joyful look in his eyes as he spoke to your little boy in the most tender and caring tone. He was like this different man with Deacon as they sat down together on the couch. Negan motioned for you to join them but you shook your head, crossing your arms in front of your chest. “Spend some time with him…” You say with kind smile as you turn towards the door. “I have to get back to work any how,”

Negan stood up from the couch, “(y/n), no you fucking do not…” He said emphatically causing you to turn around and just laugh at him.

“I am not going to marry you again Negan… once in that stable is more than enough for me.” You snap back quickly forgetting that Deacon was in ear shot. Negan took a few more steps closer to you, nearly closing the gap between your bodies.

“I never asked you to…” He placed a hand on your shoulder and you glanced down at it, unsure still of his intentions. “Let me take care of you and Deacon… I don’t want the mother of my child slaving away for points, my son dressed in fucking rags… I know it’s not your fault… let me fucking make things better for him, for you.” As he finished her squeezed your shoulder and you gazed up at him. Why couldn’t you have been like this back then? Why couldn’t you have showed me just a tiny sign that you would have been happy? You ask yourself as you slowly nod your head. Negan smiles softly and gestures back towards the couch and you reluctantly agree to join him.

As you settled down on the other side of Deacon you tried not to smile as Negan started to talk to the little boy about baseball, explaining the game to your eager son who sat perched up n her knees at his father’s side nodding his head as Negan spoke. It warmed your heart to see them sharing such a quite, normal moment. It was cut short by a loud knock on the door. “Fuck..” Negan cursed. “I told them to leave me alone…” He patted Deacon on the cheek as he stood up. “Come on, son…” He said with a little smirk as Deacon hopped down and toddled after his father who picked up Lucille as he stood before the door.

“Come on, this shit better be important…” Negan groaned before glancing down at Deacon who was gazing, wide eyed up at his father. As the doors slowly swung open you stood up and watched as a frantic Gavin and a very angry looking Simon walked through the door.  Negan reached down with his free hand held Deacon’s hand as the two men tried to calm themselves.

“We haven’t heard from the Satellite station all morning, not since lights out last night in fact…” Gavin started. Negan glanced down at Deacon who was starting to look frightens as Gavin started to go into more detail about some recent events.

“Do you not see my fucking kid standing right here you dumb shit…” Negan chided Gavin before glancing over at you. “Mama…” He said beckoning you over to him. Leaning down you scooped up Deacon before Negan leaned in. “Go down and get him some better clothes… get yourself some too…” You looked puzzled up at him not quite knowing where he was going. Before you had a chance to speak, Negan just put his hand up and continued, “(y/n) just do it… I have to deal with this now but I will get Simon to come get you once we get this shit sorted.”

“Alright Negan…” You say softly and he gives you a little smile and nod of thanks. “What if they give me shit about points?” You asked softly.

“Tell them take that up with me and give you what you want…” Negan said firmly and you gave a quick nod before walking towards the door.

As you walked past Simon with Deacon in your arms he leaned in and softly said. “Your welcome…” with a small, dark chuckle as you walked past.

Things were about to change, for the better perhaps but something deep within your soul screamed a lot of things for you and your son were about to get a lot worse.

Shadows – Poe/Reader – Oneshot

On By deathvalleyqueen666In fanfiction, finished, Poe/Reader, reader insert, star warsLeave a comment

AO3 : HERE

Summary – One Shot – Poe Dameron/Solo!Wife!Reader – In the wake of your father’s death and your mother’s near death you do your best to hold it together for the Resistance and for your family as you struggle to cope with only your husband Poe to turn to.

Warnings – General Angst, Death mentioned heavily

A/N – I kinda felt like writing something for Poe and I love a few ideas with Poe… One that if Leia and Han had a daughter… he would probably be with her… two Poe would make hands down the most adorable father… three well he would probably be a really good husband. This story kinda gives me a moment to explore some of these ideas. I do plan on writing other oneshots for this general pairing btw. Enjoy.

In the span of just a day your older brother, who was once your hero, killed your father and nearly killed your mother. Your husband, Poe – the best pilot in the fleet, was demoted and nearly got himself killed trying to destroy a Dreadknot. If it wasn’t for the toddler in your arms, there would have been hell to pay. The notorious Solo temper was not lost on you, but your daughter didn’t need to see her parents fighting. Not now. Mom would wake up just to yell at me… For a brief moment you debated on testing that theory but thought it was better if you let the anger towards your husband’s reckless actions manifest itself in one, dark look as he entered the room. Poe stopped in his tracks as his eyes met your dark gaze. The frustration over all the situations going on in your life were directed solely at him in that moment. Poe tried to muster a small smirk for you but you turned you gaze back your mother not wanting to even for a moment think of giving into his charms, like you always did.

Poe was never more thankful for your young daughter, Shara, as he was as he made his way across the med bay toward where you stood. Shara was a sweet little girl. Big, bright brown eyes. A sunny disposition even in these dark times. She was Poe’s hope, his reason for enduring and fighting. “Sweetheart…” Poe started slowly as he walked over to where you stood at your mother’s bedside. He rested his hand on the small of your back as he leaned in kissed his daughter’s chubby cheek. “Come here munchkin…” He said softly as he gingerly lifted the small child from your arms. As much as you didn’t want to let Shara go, you knew it was probably for the best. It has been whirlwind of day and you were holding on by sheer force of will and Poe knew this.

Poe leaned in and kissed your cheek as he settled the toddler in his arms. He was trying his best to be sweet. You weren’t sure if he was just trying to distract you but in truth he was worried about you. He watched you intently as your daughter started to squirm in his arms.  “Nana…” Shara muttered as her little hand reached out towards Leia. “My Nana…” The toddler cried out as she struggled to free herself from her father’s grasp.

“Nana needs to rest.” Poe tried to sound hopeful for his daughter but even his voice wavered a little bit as Shara continued to struggle in his arms. Poe was not normally the one who would have dealt with her in this situation. You were. He was a good father but dealing with an emotional child was not his strongest point.

You let out a heavy sigh. There was little point in fighting with Shara, she was your child. Leia’s granddaughter, the girl was willful and strong in force. You shook your head as your crossed your arms.  “Let her down, Poe. It isn’t going to hurt anything at this point…” You didn’t turn away from your mother but you knew Poe set the toddler down and took a step back as Shara walked over to the bedside and placed her small hand on her grandmother’s .

“Wake up Nana…” Shara whispered as she leaned her head on the bed looking up at Leia. You reach your hand down and run your fingers through your daughter’s wild curls and muster a little smile.

Crouching down you looked your daughter in the eye and you brushed a stray curl behind her ear. “Go with daddy, Shara.” You start as you point towards Poe who was standing a few feet away. “I just need a few more minutes okay, then we can go.” The little girl nodded and started to pad off she stopped for a moment and paused.

She looked up at you with those big, hopeful eyes and asked a question that had no intention to break your heart as it was about to. “Is she going to be okay?” Shara asked in the softest of voices as she waited for your answer, gazing up at you.

“She will be fine…” You finally utter softly leaning down and touching your mother’s hand, all but ignoring your daughter. The mere thought of her not being okay was ripping soul in two. You had lost your father, when he died you felt it. The pain of part of your soul dying with him. You never wanted to feel that pain again, and most certainly not so soon.  “You have to be fine Mom… you have to be…” Your voice was so weak, you barely believed the the words you uttered yourself but there had to be reason for all of this. As you sat next to your mother’s bedside Poe bounced the daughter you shared in his arms as he tried to keep the mood light with here while you held on by a thread.

Shara, like all those of the Skywalker line, was force sensitive and she could sense the tension in the air. Her deep brown eyes searched the room as she reached out towards her grandmother. “Nana,” the little girl called out once more. Poe kissed her dark curls as he turned her away trying his best to keep the little girl from understanding the seriousness of the situation.

“Shara…” He started softly as he forced her to look at him with a gentle touch under her chin. “Nana is going to be fine… Daddy’s always right, right?” He said with a soft smile.

The little girl shook her head and reached out and touched her father’s face in the same way he had just done. “No..” She cooed with a little laugh that soon turned to a full roaring laugh as Poe began to tickle her. She was a clever girl and your mother would have loved to have seen that moment. It would have made her very proud.

You looked up and for the first time that day smiled genuinely watching such a sweet moment between the two people you loved the most. “You were always right about Poe,” You mutter softly as you clasped your mother’s hand. “He is so much like dad…” Leia’s hand twitched and you could feel the sadness radiate off her at the mention of your father. “I still think he is going to just show up with a big, cheesy grin on his face. Maybe with presents in hand because, you know,  when dad really screwed up he always brought us something back. I just want him to walk in and go ‘jokes on you… where’s my girls?’ like he was just off on some run with Ben and everything is as it should have always been and this all has been just a horrible nightmare.” Your words were so soft, but you had wished so hard that they were true. It wasn’t just the loss of your father that hit you hard, it was the fact that you knew now, Ben was gone. You close your eyes and fight back the tears as you clasp your hand over your mouth.

Poe was watching from a few feet away, Shara yawning in his arms. She had gotten little sleep the night before. A command ship in the midst of a war zone was not the most conducive to a proper night’s sleep, even when it was what Shara had known for most of her life. “Mama is having a rough time baby girl…” Poe muttered more to himself than to your daughter as he watched you continue to speak softly to your mother. “What are we gonna do?”

Shara looked up at her father through heavy eyes as she gave a little shrug and Poe cracked a grin. “Well, I guess we’ll just love Mama. Because we can’t do much else, huh?” Shara nodded sleepy as settled against his chest before letting a soft yawn.

You can hear the soft exchange between your husband and daughter but don’t pay it much mind. All your attention was focused on trying to keep what composure you had left intact. You leaned down a kissed Leia’s hand before you stand from the bed and turn back to Poe and Shara who was nearly asleep now. “Who did they put in charge?” You ask in a hushed tone not wanting to jar your daughter awake.

“They put Holdo in charge,” Poe informed you flatly. Like you had he was talking in a hushed done but you could see the displeasure with the situation spread across his face.  His free hand reaching out towards you. As upset at him you were for his overly risky actions against the dreadknot, you still took it and leaned into him.

“Holdo?” You questioned softly, a little taken aback because you had not expected her of all people to be given command.  Poe just nods quickly as you leaned back before sitting down next to him.

“I thought they were going to say you would lead in your mother’s place..” Poe noted and he was shocked that you were not mentioned once in the meeting but he wasn’t going to share that information with you. He knew if you knew that you were completely overlooked, on top of everything else, it wasn’t going to be pretty. Poe’s arm started to fall asleep under the weight of the sleeping Shara in his arms, he shifted her slightly  as he glanced back at Leia. “Isn’t that what she would have wanted?”

You shook your head quickly. “Mom never wanted me apart of any of this… after I fled the temple and came home, she wanted to keep me away from all this. Just have a normal little life, why do you think she was so happy when we got married and had her..” You said softly reaching out and touching Shara’s cheek as she rested her head against her father’s shoulder. “She thought we were going to have the lovely boring life.”

Poe smirked that cheeky little smirk that always had a way of making you smile back at him as he laughed. “And here I thought it was because your mother actually liked me..” He joked as he settled in a nearby chair with Shara still nestled against his chest on the brink of falling asleep in her father’s arms.

“She loves you like her own son…” You replied quickly, not wanting him to think for a moment longer that your mother didn’t care about him. She adored Poe, he was one of the few things that kept her going after everything with Ben. He wasn’t her son by blood, but he a son to her in every other way.

“She demoted me really fast for someone who is supposed to love me like a son.” Poe huffed softly as your eyes focused on his face, a scowl growing across your lips. You knew exactly why you mother did that and it was because she loved him so much.

Letting out a long sigh you reached over and touched his hand. “You were reckless, you could have been killed.” You echo your mother’s words and tone almost perfectly. “Your lucky she didn’t beat you half to death for what you did…” You caution as you stand up. Sitting still was not a good thing for you in that moment. You had to move. So you began to pace back and forth in front of Poe. Your arms crossed in front of your chest, eyes cast to the floor.

“She did slap me.” Poe replied with a little humor in his voice. The image of your mother slapping your husband whilst surely chastising him for his recklessness made you smirk. “Don’t smile at that… that’s not fair (y/n).” He sounded hurt but he was happy to see you smile again. Even if it was at his expense.

“Oh I wish I could seen it…” You smirk at him before turning back to your mother. “You do know dad would have done the same thing… Uncle Luke too” You point out hoping your mother could hear you. “It was a very Han Solo like move you pulled..” Poe nods slowly and and though you were still mad, it was the kind of mad that you mother use to be at your father when he did something stupid. After all these years you finally understood.

“I think I made your old man proud.” Poe pointed out proudly as he leaned back in the chair, one hand resting on the back of Shara’s deep chocolate curls and the other rubbing small circles on the sleeping child’s back as her small hands gripped his shirt tightly.

“My dad would have called you an idiot and a reckless kid to do that with your wife and kid on the command ship.” You snap quickly. Your father was a lot of things, reckless among them, but not when it came to his family. You take a long deep breath as you turn back towards your mother for a moment. There was one bone you didn’t get to pick with your mother before everything had happened. The Falcon. She had let the scavenger girl, Rey, take it to find Luke. Your eyes narrow in on your mother and your lips purse before you spun around quickly on your heel to face your husband once more. “Do you know she gave that girl my ship to go find Luke.”

“The Falcon is not your ship, (y/n)…” Poe pointed out quickly. Though he knew it was a slightly risky move. “It was your father’s ship..”

“It was our home…” You snap quickly, emotions you had tried to bury for years were starting to bubble to the surface. “I was born on that ship… so was Ben… all my life I dreamt of one day my father giving it to me. You know my grandfather worked on the line on Coreila that built those ships… the Falcon is as a part of my family as Chewie…” Your voice wavered as you recounted information that Poe had heard a thousand times over the years. “It by all rights is mine…”

“I know, when she returns with Luke… which will happen.” Poe said though he was less than confident of that fact. “The Falcon will be ours…” He started but quickly corrected himself when he saw the stern look cross your face. “Yours… the Falcon will be yours… but you are going to let me fly the ship that made the Kessle run in 14..”

“12… it was 12 parsects…” You correct before he could even finish speaking. As you thought back to on your father’s life your heart sank. “Uncle Lando… Oh kiff… I have get word to Cloud City, Lando doesn’t know…Lando doesn’t know” In that moment realizing your father’s closest friend didn’t even know he was gone, you finally broke. Tears streamed down your cheeks as you double over where you stood. Your hands moving to your mouth to muffle a loud heart wrenching sob.

Poe glanced down at the toddler in his arms for a moment before laying her down on the bench he was sitting on as he stood up. He placed a gentle hand on Shara’s back as she stirred but settled again quickly. With your daughter settled Poe rushed to your side. “My girl..” he muttered as he pulled you up and into him. His arms wrapping tightly around you as you continued to sob your hands barely muffling your wails. “I know baby… I know…” Poe rested his head against yours as you continued to release all the pent up sorrow that had been building for hours. “It’s going to be okay, maybe not today… maybe not tomorrow but it is going to be okay…someday.” Poe didn’t believe the words himself but someone had told him the same thing when his mother passed away and he felt the same heartbreak his wife was feeling. It still hurt but he could live with it now. He had so much more to live for now with his family. She had to remember that to get through all the pain she was feeling.

“I will never forgive him…” You mumbled through your sobs as you tried to pull yourself back together. “It’s never going to be okay Poe, he didn’t die in his sleep… he didn’t die and old man surrounded by his children, grandchildren. He died by his own….” You stopped for a moment and took another long breath as you collected yourself enough to finish. “His own son’s hand. My brother… don’t act like you know how this feels, Poe.” There was so much pain in your voice that Poe could almost feel your heartbreak as you looked up at him as he took a long, deep breath before he wiped the trails of tears from your cheeks.

“I don’t know, you are right.” He started softly as he made you look at him before continuing, “You don’t have to, you never have to forgive Ben for anything this has done.” Poe reassured. He had his own beef with Ben Solo, or Kylo Ren… who ever was behind that mask. That he was not about let go any time soon. He had seen the damage that Ben had caused his family. Poe had picked up the pieces that were left of you after he betrayed everything you were taught and followed the darkness. He watched Leia’s heartbreak over and over again every time a ship returned and Ben didn’t step off. That wasn’t even what he had done to him when he was captured. He loved you very much, but he hated your brother with a passion. Poe mustered a soft smirk as he leaned down to kiss you gently, his hand pushing your hair off your face as he did so. “He isn’t apart of our family any more, he made his choice…”

“He made his choice…” You echo softly trying so hard to push a slew of memories, both good and bad from your mind. Ben and you were close. Only 2 years apart, there was little you could recall of your childhood that didn’t include your brother. You would have never imagined as a little girl, racing after your big brother, that one day you would be on the other side of a war. That he would have killed your father. There was still a part of your brain that wouldn’t allow that to make sense to you. Ben, your Ben. Could have never done that.

Poe rested his head against yours as he glance for a moment at your sleeping daughter then over at your mother. “We are sitting ducks, the fleet is destroyed… the ships are getting picked off one by one..” His tone was grim and you swallow hard as he continues. “They are doing nothing… nothing… (y/n).” He lets out a heavy sigh as he leans back and your jaw tenses as you see the look on Poe’s face. It was a look you knew far too well, it was the look of trouble and stupid plan. “Do you think you could talk to Maz?” He started and you instantly started shaking your head. “Maz likes you… you are are her favorite Solo…” He smirked in an attempt to sway you but it didn’t work at all.

“We have to trust Holdo, she served under my mother before… I know she is a smart woman..” You place your hands on his shoulders. “This… is why my mother knocked you down to captain…”

“Because I want to protect my family?” Poe said in a frustrated tone.  He was far from the only one frustrated as you pushed him back and turned away. “We need help.. Baby girl listen to me please…” His voice was low and there was a desperate tone to it that you hadn’t heard very many times before. “I need you to talk to Maz, see if she can at least get you and Shara off the ship and to some place safe.” His rough hands clasped your wrists as he stood before you looking deep into your eyes. “If anything happens to her… to you…” He squeezed your hands as he closed his eyes for a moment. “You need to get far away from your brother, this war… all of it and take our daughter with you. You should have gone with what’s her name… the scavenger girl..”

“The one that took my ship…” You snap.

“Yeah, her… you should have taken Shara and went to Luke with her. That would have been the safest place for the both of you.” He sounded like he was scolding himself. It wasn’t his idea though to keep you close to your mother as things grew to a head with the First Order. It was your mother’s. She thought she could protect you, keep you all safe. Once Shara was born, she feared that Snoke or even Ben would seek her out to kidnap her so she could be manipulated to the dark side from a far younger age than Ben had. With Poe often away on missions, leaving you alone much of the time your mother stepped in and convinced you it was best for the both of you to stay close to her. It was the single choice you questioned as mother, was listening to your own.

“Well we are here, and nothing can change that now Poe.” You let out a long sigh and looked over at your mother and a swell of emotion started to build in your chest once more. “I am not leaving my mother either.” You choked out as you fought back tears.

Poe bit his bottom lip as he nodded his head and pulled you into a tight embrace. “I love you so much, (y/n)” He uttered softly as he held you tightly in his arms for a few minutes. As he pushed you back he looked you and back at his daughter. “We need to leave, we need to get everyone away from here. If you won’t leave, then we just have to expand the escape plan.” Poe was talking at you not to you as he worked out his own plan.

You could almost see the gears of his mind turning as he stood holding you barely an arms length from him. His hands still gripping your shoulders as he continued. “We have to find some place to hide… a base… a treehouse in the woods would work at this point.”

“Like the one you had on Yavin…” You chuckled softly trying to break the tense mood just slightly but Poe scoffed and shook his head.

His hands fell away from your arms as he took a step back. “I would take a hole in the ground, (y/n)” Poe was worried, was so frustrated by the whole situation. He was not used to feeling helpless like this. He glanced over at Leia and let out a heavy sigh.

Just as Poe was about to go over and sit with Leia, the medbay doors hissed open and the figure of the young, former, Stormtrooper Finn and a young woman standing next to him. “Poe… we have an idea that might just save the fleet.” Both of you snapped around, eyes focusing on his face.

Poe takes a few steps forward and motioned for him to come in. “Let’s hear this plan that is going to save the Rebellion…”

Imagine Being Negan’s Favorite Wife and he comes to you after the first outpost is attacked by Rick’s group

On By deathvalleyqueen666In fanfiction, Negan/Favorite!Wife, NSFW fanfic, reader insert, The Walking DeadLeave a comment

You lay stretched across the bed you share with Negan, fast asleep. You had fallen asleep by yourself, which wasn’t a rare occurrence so it didn’t raise any alarms. You were abruptly awaken from your rather peaceful slumber by a string of venomous curses and the sound of heavy metal door to your room slam shut. Startled, roll over and prop yourself up against the plush feather pillows as you wipe the sleep from your eyes, you see your husband pacing angrily in the space between the bed you shared and the small living space that was set up in the other half of the room.

A furious look was painted across his face, the pale moon light shining through the windows made the expression look all the more menacing. “Negan..” You mutter softly as you scoot the edge of the bed. “What’s the matter?” You are still sleepy but your husband, still so enraged by whatever situation had occurred, turned to you and tried to muster a softer expression.

“Just more useless bull shit (y/n),” He said trying downplay the situation. He took a few steps towards you, closing the gap between you. He set Lucille next to his side of the bed before taking your face in his hands. “Don’t worry.” He said quickly before leaning down and placing an almost sweet kiss on your lips. As he pulled back, his large, strong hands falling away from your face you reach out and grab on.

You give him a gentle tug back towards the bed you share. “but I do worry my love…” you say softly gazing up at him as he towers over you. Using your free hand you pat a spot next to you on the bed, “What happened Negan, something happened, you wouldn’t be so upset if it really was just useless bull shit.” Negan had never spared you from the violence of this world and the group he was in charge of, whatever was going you tended to know about it sooner or later.

He sat down next to you on the edge of the bed and wrapped his arm around your shoulder. You nestled your head against his chest, you could hear his heart still pounding with rage in his chest. “The Satellite outpost was attacked last night…” He started, he tone was serious and though he spoke calmly you could tell that there was an infinite amount of rage behind that calmness. “Everyone dead… slaughtered like fucking animals in the god damn sleep (y/n)”

Instantly you could only think of one culprit. “Was it those women again? The ones from that group that Simon killed all their husbands and son?” It was a horrible thing that even unsettled Negan and Simon had suffered for it.

Negan shrugged. “Maybe or it could be a whole new group of assholes looking to start a god damn war, they saw the set up we have. The outposts. The other groups working to help make that Saviors stronger…” You were not as blind as Negan often thought you were when it came to the true nature of what went on with those other groups but you let him have his little illusion of saving the world in this moment.

“Well if it is a new group… we need to bring them into the fold right.”  You reach your left hand up and touch his stubble covered cheek. He needed someone to take him off the war path, to be his voice of reason or at very least a much needed distraction. “If you do what I know you want to…”

“Find who they are and kill every single last one of them…” your husband growled.

You hush him as you straddle him, playfully pushing him back so he was laying across the bed. His hands grip your hips as you lean forward perching yourself above him. “You can’t do that can you..” You say in a low, sensual tone. You had to distract him from his rage and there was always one sure fire way to get that man to relax. You give him a devious smile as you slowly unzip his leather jacket as his hands slide under your silk nightgown to discover you were not wearing much else.

“Why is that..” He groans as one of his hands slips between your thighs, feeling how wet you were waiting for him. You hands push the leather jacket open as you move your hips in a slow circle trying to create some friction between you and Negan’s large, rough hand that was lingering between your thighs. He smirks as he watches you push up his white shirt and trying to reach his buckle.

He tuts and teasingly slides one of his long fingers deep with in your core, causing you to let out a slightly startled moan. “Oh… you want more…” His voice little more than a growl as he slowly pulls his finger out, teasing your clit with his thumb slightly. He leans forward for a moment, his lips brush against ear sending a shiver down your spine and the heat to grow between your legs. “Answer my questions like a good girl and maybe I will give my Queen a prize..”

His touch had made you lose you train of thought, ‘what were we talking about again?’ you ask youself. “The outpost…” you moan softly answer a silent question. You look down at your husband, his thumb still occasionally teasing you as you try and collect your thought. Negan was not going to make this easy for you, he saw the game you were trying to play and countered with one of his own. “You can’t kill them..” You start though soft moans. “Because we need them… we need there shit… we need them to work for us, almost as badly as I need your cock inside me… right now…”

Negan plunges two fingers back inside you this time as wraps his other hand grips your waist tightly pushing you down onto his fingers deeper. He has a large grin across his face. Partly from your sound advice but mostly from the loud moans he was causing to escape your lips as fingers brushed against your gspot, causing your muscles to tighten around his fingers causing a moan of his own to escape. He had just about enough of this teasing, his cock was rock solid and straining painfully against the fabric of his jeans. He pulls his hand from between your thighs and slips the two fingers, still slick with your juices into your mouth. You suck hungrily on them as you tasted yourself. Negan bit his bottom lip watching this. Your hands slip down to his belt, undoing the buckle swiftly. You pop the top button on his jeans open and slip your hand inside gripping his sizeable, rock solid cock. “You should put that mouth to far better use then dispensing advice my Queen..” It may have sounded like a suggestion but you knew it was more of demand.

You flipped around, so your ass was now positioned directly infront of his face, inviting him to taste you as you unzipped his jeans, freeing his member and taking it into mouth. As you are running your tongue along the tip teasing him you feel his hot mouth take your clit into his mouth, his tongue lightly flicking it causing a loud moan around his cock as your continued your own work. His fingers joined the concert again, and what a beautiful on it was. They pumped rhythmically in and out of your and delicious and perfect pace. Each thrust of his fingers met with a tease of his tongue to your clit.

You could feel yourself being pushed closer and closer to the edge. “I want your cock inside me when I cum…” You moan around his cock. Negan stops and you turn to look at him through heavy eyes.

He smacks your ass signaling he was more than ready and it was time for you to get what you desired. You roll off him and lay flat on the bed, you legs spread wide waiting for him as he stripped off his leather jacket and shed his t-shirt. He crawls between your legs, not wanting to waste a moment more taking his pants of boots off and in one swift movement he pushed deep inside you. As he stills himself for a moment allowing you time relish in the size of him his pulls your silk nightgown over your head exposing your naked form to him. “Fuck… I will never get over how beautiful you look when I’m fucking you…” He teases as he slowly starts rock his hips starting build a comfortable pace.

“Shut up and fuck me…” You moan wanting him to lose this lazy pace and fuck you hard. He chuckles at your word but takes the hint. His pace quickens as a hand slides up your stomach over your bare breasts and gently grips your throat. His pace grows faster as your wrap your legs around his waist urging him to go harder still. His other hand leaves your waist and grips your shoulder as he thrust into harder and faster.

You feel a familiar heat grow deep with in the pit of your stomach, your toes curl as your feel yourself getting pushed closer and closer to cuming with each thrust of Negan’s incredible cock. “I’m gonna cum” You moan softly feeling yourself so close to that bliss that you could almost taste that sweet release. Your words fuel Negan’s desire and pace. He is frantic now, close to the edge himself. As your walls clamp down on his still pounding cock he lets out a deep moan feeling you start come around him. He can not hold back any longer. He shoots his white hot seed deep with your core as you both cum together in a fury of thrusts and moans. “FUCK..” Negan groans as his back arches and he takes one last hard thrust pushing his seed deep with in you in hope that maybe this time maybe he would be lucky enough to get your pregnant.

He smiles down at you and you smile up at him. “In a little better mood..” You said with soft laugh as he leans down and places a passionate kiss on your lips.

“I’m still pissed… but yes my love… yes”

Imagine Negan Catching Simon Flirting With you

On By deathvalleyqueen666In fanfiction, Negan/Favorite!Wife, reader insert, The Walking DeadLeave a comment

The Sanctuary was buzzing with tension, war was in the air. You had found Sherry’s stash of smokes in the liquor cabinet and ducked into the hallway to attempt to calm your very rocky nerves. First with Negan getting trapped in the trailer and returning covered in walker gore with that priest and now with the horde breaking through and everyone having to escape and then finally being able to return to your home once more. It seemed since your paths crossed with Rick and his groups that your life had been nothing but chaos.

Sitting on a step you shaky hand strikes a match and brings it to the very stale cigarette. You cough hard as your take the first drag. “Fuck!” You curse before you take another drag this time it being slightly smoother. As you exhale the second drag you hear foot steps coming. At first you thought it was your husband, the sound of those heavy boots on the concrete so you turn around to see Simon standing behind you, looming over you with a devious smile on his face.

“Well hello there,” He starts slowly as you quickly put out your cigarette and stand up pulling you short black dress down slightly as you see Simon’s eyes go straight to the hem of the dress. “my my, no wonder you are his favorite…” Your eyes follow him as he leans against the wall his eyes almost burning your skin as the roam up and down your body in Negan’s favorite of your black dresses, the one that hugged all your curves in the right places. You watched as Simon’s hands went down and gripped his belt buckle adjusting it as he smirked down at you.

“And what is that supposed to mean Simon?” You ask giving him a slightly strange look. You had never been fond of your husband’s right hand man. He gave you the creeps at times. Though he did his job, most of the time, you still could never trust him after he killed all those men in that community a few years ago. You knew that he knew better than to flirt with you.. you of all Negan’s wives. The only one he came into the Sanctuary with, his real wife. Simon scratched the back of his neck as he took a few steps forward and down  so he was perched over you as you leaned against cold cement wall.

“Oh nothing other than I am still not fucking sure how Negan kept you once he got all those other wives.” His closeness as he spoke made you uncomfortable. Your heart raced and your breath quickened out of fear but Simon thought you liked what he said so he continued and reached up to push a few stray hairs off your face. Your eyes close and your face cringes as he touches you and speaks to you in a low husky tone. “Do you even remember what it’s like for a man to cherish you, to be the only one that he loves…” Your skin crawled as he spoke, so distracted by your discomfort you didn’t hear the door open while Simon was speaking.

The familiar voice of your husband, all though quite filled with anger instantly calmed you. “What in the fucking good god damn hell do you think you are fucking doing Simon” He roared. Simon jumped back, stumbling slightly on the stairs as Negan’s voice echoed through the stairwell.

With out thinking you race up the stairs towards your husband and wrap your arms around his waist as he wraps one arm protectively around you the other grips Lucille tightly in his hand pointing it at Simon. “I… I…” you stammer worried that your husband would think even for a moment that you were anything other than scared when Simon started making advances towards you. Negan’s arm pulls you closer and you rest you head on his leather jacket covered chest.

“Shhh, I know you would never my Queen…” He hushed you softly his voice calm and soothing before looked back up at Simon who was looking mighty nervous as he put his hands up. “Don’t even fucking try to start…” Negan once again roared making you jump a little feeling the tension in every muscle of his body as he spoke.

“I was just fucking playing boss.” Simon defended but Negan shook his head and waved Lucille at him in protest.

“How long have you fucking known me Simon? HOW FUCKING LONG..” Negan roared as your eyes darted from your beloved husband’s face, twisted in rage to the man who suddenly looked much smaller and weaker from the safety of your husband’s arms.

Simon took a heavy gulp, “3…3…years…” Simon stammered and Negan leaned down and kissed the side of your head to calm you before he pushed you behind him as he took a step forward poking the tip of Lucille into Simon’s chest.

“In those three fucking years has (y/n), my wife, been with anyone else?” Simon shook his head as Negan poked him in the chest once more. “No, no she fucking hasn’t because my Queen is my Queen because she will love me in a castle or a fucking cage.” Negan looked back at you and smiled an almost evil looking smile. “Isn’t that right my love?” He asks you.

“Yes, my love..” You say softly with a nod that receives a much kinder smile from your husband for a moment trying to take comfort in that momentary kind gaze. You knew he was a man capable of great violence. You had witnessed it many times but had never once been on the receiving end. Most of the violence you had seen your husband commit had been to protect you or someone else, but more often than not you.

Negan turned back to Simon who had his hands up. “Please I was just playing with her, she looked so sad..”

“If my wife looks sad it’s not your fucking job to cheer her up no is it? It’s a job for her fucking husband, who happens to be this big dicked mother fucker…” You bit your bottom lip as you peered out from behind your husband to watch the expression of fear turn to terror on Simon’s face as Negan closed the gap and he was right up in his face. “How many fucking times to I have to tell your pea brained dickless fucking ass to keep those slimy fucking mitts of my girls… but most of all (y/n). Don’t fucking speak her name, don’t look at her, if you see her walking down the fucking hall turn the fucking mustache about fucking face and high tail your ass in another direction. Do not so much as cast a shadow on my Queen if you want to make it through the fucking day with your cranium in-fucking-tact”

Simon didn’t need another hint, he quickly turned his back towards you and Negan before racing several levels below weather he needed to or not. Negan turned back to your setting Lucille down against the wall as he closed the gap between the two of you. His tall frame loomed over you as he bent down and captured your lips in a passionate kiss. His long, leather gloved covered fingers entangle in your hair as he pulls you deeper into the kiss. You let out a little moan and a sigh as his lips part from yours. “What were you doing in here by yourself my Queen?” He asked a little tone of disappointment in his voice. “How many times have I said you can’t just go out any more like you used to.” He pulled you into a tight embrace. “We have enemies everywhere my love, and you are what is precious most to me in the world.” He admitted softly making your heart skip a beat as you smiled softly up at him.

“I’m so sorry baby, I just wanted a moment peace darling.” You say softly and Negan lets out a heavy sight and caresses your cheek.

“Soon baby we will have peace again I promise.”

Imagine Negan Finding out you are pregnant before you have a chance to tell him yourself (fluffy)

On By deathvalleyqueen666In fanfiction, finished, Negan/Favorite!Wife, reader insert, The Walking DeadLeave a comment

The Sanctuary was a big place, or at least felt that way. Unlike the other wives Negan gave you far more autonomy to just go about your day. He trusted you more than them. Most of the wives had little desire to go out and do much of anything anyhow. You on the other hand, you always had loved to be outside, particularly you enjoyed tending the small garden that grew within the fences. The warmth from the sun on your skin, the feel of the dirt on your hands, it was bliss. There was something stratifying watching the plants grow and thrive. The plants are the only thing I get to help grow now. You muse silently as you pull a few weeds from the earth.

You had learned that you were expecting a baby nearly a week ago, you hadn’t found a chance yet to sit and talk with your husband and tell him the good news. Every time you went to have just a few minutes alone with him someone would come in with some probably. You tried a half dozen times before you both went to sleep at night but after he had you he always would just kiss you then roll over too tired from the day to sit and talk like you used to. Before the other wives you thought bitterly as you plunged your hand spade into the damn earth with great force.

The idea of sharing your husband with other women made your blood boil and the early pregnancy hormones coursing through you was not helping with your jelouse streak as of late either. One of the works saw your display and scooted away from you with her eyes cast down and part of you felt bad for making her nervous. You muster a little smile for the young woman before you go back to weeding the tomato plants.

A little bit of time passes, you are lost in the methodical labor of weeding the plants when so notice a large shadow cover the ground you were tending. Negan you knew it was him, you could smell the leather from his jacket, the fait smell of blood from his ever present baseball bat. You glance over the shoulder half expecting to see your husband smiling down at you but instead you find his face painted with a stern and almost angry look that made you catch your breath. “Hi babe,” You say softly as you pull the gloves from your hands and dust the dirt off your jeans before you stand up and kiss your husband on the cheek but he doesn’t pull you in for passionate kiss as he normally does. He stands there looking at you.

Negan could be a cruel man, this you knew and had always known, but he never was cruel to you. He was kind, stern when you needed, he had high expectations of you and there had been instances where you needed a little bit of his special guidance but you enjoyed that as much as he did. You knew the looks he gave you if you had broken a rule, the look he was giving you was unlike anything you had seen before directed at you. “My…dear…wife..” He started in a frigid tone as he finally reached out and touched you cheek as he slithered his hand into your hair gripping it tightly as he forced you to look up at him. “Is there anything… anything at all… that you need to tell me?”

His words sent a chill down your spine He knows, he knows about the baby your mind races as your pulse quickens. “I…uh.” You stumbled to find your words as his grip on your hair tightens and he waits for you to say anything. Your eyes dart around to the other faces watching the display. You wanted to have this conversation in private. “Can we just talk some place private?” You ask meekly.

Negan shakes his head. “No…” He leans in closely his hot breath almost burning your lips as the quiver. “You lost that privilege” he chose the word carefully knowing that it would send a tingle down your spine in spite of the tense situation.

You lick lips as you close your eyes taking a long, deep breath. “I’m pregnant, you obviously already knew that though.” He lets go of your hair and you take a slightly nervous step back putting just a small amount of distance between you and your still angry husband.

“What made you fucking think you could keep that from me (y/n)? Fucking enlighten me please.” He leans forward as he speaks in a hushed tone. Simon turns his back to you both and motions for the others to the same. It wasn’t private but it was show of respect for the situation unfolding.

You cross your arms in front of you chest and tilt your head to one side. “Well lets see.. you are busy fucking the other wives and dealing with whatever nonsense it is you do all day… you come back to our room at night… fuck me and then roll over and go to sleep. It really doesn’t give one opportunity to fucking sit and have a conversation does it?” Negan leaned back a little and bit his bottom lip as you snapped back at him, your eyes blaze with jealousy. “I wanted to tell  you right away, I was so damn happy we are finally having a baby.” You pause and smile for a moment before your face drops once more. “But you were so consumed in this fucking empire you think you run… with your wives and underlings… that I couldn’t time to talk to you… How are you going to have time for this kid Negan?” You look away from your husband as you finish speaking. You were not ashamed of what you had sad but you knew that it could be returned with a harsh response.

So when he reached out and touched your hip and gently urged you closer to him you were slightly surprised. You oblige him and he sets Lucille down resting it against a near by fence, which in truth made your heart skip a beat. His other hand joined the first on your hip as he gazed down at you. “I will find time, make time… that’s my fucking kid.” He smiled brightly and any anxiety seemed to float away. “But hearing that my Queen, my love…” He leaned forward and nibbled teasingly on your bottom lip before kissing you tenderly. “had my kid in the toaster from goddamn Carson in the hall was not fucking cool darlin’ not fucking cool…” his voice close to a sensual growl at the end.

You bit your bottom lip and looked up at him. “I’m sorry,” You begin as you snake your arm around his neck pulling him closer before whispering in his ear, “Daddy…” Negan let out a little groan at the sound of that name for him escaping your lips. His tongue darted across his lips as his grip on your waist.

“Say it again…” He said with a great hunger behind his voice.

“I’m sorry, Daddy”  you repeat again this time with a soft giggle at the end which causes your husband to pick you up and toss your over his shoulder making you laugh. “Negan… put me down..” You squeal as you continue to laugh. He gives your denim covered ass a smack that send a pulsating heat straight to your very core.

“Nope… you have been a bad girl.” He teased. “Grab Lucille, because I am going to go teach you lesson that this sweet ass is never going to forget…” He gripped your ass tight with his large, rough hands. “about lying to the father of your child.” Your cheeks flush red at his words and behavior knowing that so many people could see the display. As he began to carry you still over his shoulder, Lucille in your hand you mused.

Well at least he is taking me back to our room this time… last time he just fucked me in the shed. Maybe he is maturing. Your thought was cut short when his hand came down on your ass once more with thwack and you let a little unconscious moan.

“Just making sure you were still paying attention there baby girl..Daddy’s got all sorts of punishments in mind for this little fuck up missy…” You giggle with excitement as your mind begins to race with all the possible ways he was going to dish out sweet torment in just a few moments…

Imagine Being Negan’s Favorite Wife and getting into a fight with one of the other wives and Negan comes in and breaks it up

On By deathvalleyqueen666In fanfiction, Negan/Favorite!Wife, reader insert, The Walking DeadLeave a comment

Being Negan’s favorite wife could be problematic at times, though you always told yourself that his love and devotion to you above all else was well worth whatever little headaches it would cause. The most common issue that would arise was that the other wives were unhappy for some reason or another. Unlike you, who married Negan out of love, most of the women felt forced into marrying him. Though you knew your husband would never force a woman to do anything they didn’t want to.

The latest upheaval amongst the wives was caused by the disappearance of Sherry, a sister wife you were never quite fond of. Not that you were all that fond of any woman who had shared your husband in the way they did.  There were hushed conversations going on as you walked into the parlor where all of Negan’s wives would gather throughout the day. One by one as the other women noticed you enter the conversations seem to quickly end and soon all the women are in silence, looking up at you with a certain amount of fear in their eyes.

You give a cool, calm, almost devious smile as your lips part, “Well, don’t stop your conversations on my behalf…” Your voice is filled with confidence, so much so that it bordered on arrogance but you were his wife, he loved you, you wore Lucille’s wedding ring, he picked you before he even met most of the women before you. That confidence was well earned.

As you walk towards your favorite chair, the one that sat next to the chair that Negan always sat in when he visited the wives, you noticed the glares you were getting from one wife in particular. She was newer than most of the other wives, she had only been one of the wives for a month..perhaps two… you never really kept track of how long they had been around because you knew they didn’t really matter to him, not like you did. The new wife looked scared, not of you but of what your husband was going to do to the rest of them for Sherry’s transgression. You brush your thoughts about her aside as you walk past her taking the last few steps towards your chair.

There was a dark haired woman sitting in but without a single sound escaping your ruby red lips, she stands up allowing you to take your rightful position. The new wife looks over her shoulder nervously at you, she leans over to one of the blonde ones who is sitting next to her and whispers something before standing up and making her way towards you.

You look up at her as she stands before you, her arms crossed in front of her chest. “(y/n) you have to make sure Negan doesn’t punish us for Sherry leaving.” The young woman’s tone was demanding.

You tut softly as your shake your head, “I don’t have to do anything for you.” You say curtly. You couldn’t believe the audacity of the young woman to think that you could make your husband do anything. He loved you dearly, he listened to your advice but he made up his own mind. This girl should have known that by now. “All I have to do is be a good, faithful wife to my husband…” You add as you lean back in the chair.

The girl looks frustrated by your answer and angered by it as well. “You are the only person he would listen to… please… most of us are trapped..”

“Trapped…” You laugh, that was rich. “Trapped… you ALL made your choice to marry my husband to save your own hides and have Negan take care of you and your families… which he has. You made your own bed, you are going to have to fucking lay in it.” There were times where you were still incredibly bitter about having to the share the man that you loved so dearly with nearly a dozen other women. They didn’t have the same type of relationship that you two shared but that didn’t matter. Deep down, you were a very jealous woman.

The young wife looked dumbfounded by your retort. “You are so fucking stupid not to see what that man does… he threatens us, when we were workers struggling each and every day.” Her last comment makes you laugh and you stand up getting the other woman’s face.

“Struggling, darling you don’t have the faintest fucking idea of the struggle that you could be facing…” You lean forward, your faces only a few inches apart as you continue in a low and vicious tone. “You want to find out… because if you want to leave, that… that I make happen really fucking quick and then you can see what an ungrateful little bitch you are being.”  No sooner do you finish speaking does the young woman’s hand come across your face with a crack as she slaps you.

You are dumbfounded by this at first as you bring your left hand to your cheek, touching the hot red mark when her hand had met your face. As you start to regain your senses you feel a rush of rage serge through your body. “Fucking Bitch…” You scream as you lunge forward knocking the young woman back into an end table as you topple onto of her in a fury. Your hand grips her hair tightly as you tussle with the young wife on the floor trying to bash her face into the concrete. “You stupid fucking whore… I’m gonna fucking kill you.” You screech as you finally manage to slam her head to the floor. Some of the other wives try to come pull you off her and fail as you continue to wail on the woman who had the balls to hit you. “You…don’t…ever…fucking…” you bellowed between blows.

You were causing a lot of commotion and you knew it was only matter of time before it drew attention from your husband’s men, but you were not expecting the doors to fling open and Negan to walk through to seen the scene playing out before him. His ever present weapon, Lucille, came crashing down onto a table near the door with a loud bang. “ENOUGH!” he screamed causing you to instantly halt your assault and look over at the man you loved so much whom was seething with rage.

“(y/n)…” Your husband started as he gazed down at you somewhat surprised when he realized that it was you, his beloved wife… his ‘Queen’… who was taking part in such a absurd display. He shook his head and couldn’t help but laugh knowing the girl likely deserved whatever punishment. “Get off the stupid little girl before you kill her… I am really not in mood to deal with another body today.” His tone was surprisingly soft in the situation and the other wives took note of this as you rolled off the young wife and slowly stood up gazing down at the bloody mess that you had created with a satisfied smirk on your face.

Your husband noticed this. “Pleased with yourself?” He asked cocking his head to the side slightly as he gazed at you, all disheveled from you fight.

“She fucking deserved it baby… I swear… that little bitch fucking hit me first.” You explain as you make your way slowly over to your husband, placing one of your bloody hands on his leather jacket cover chest. You gaze up at him as he looks around at the other wives.

“Is what (y/n) said true ladies?”  He asked more for show but it would not have been the first time that you picked a fight with one of the wives. During the first few months of having the first group of wives added you’re your marriage, you had started your fair share fights out of pure jealousy. So part of him wanted to make sure that the promise you made to stop trying to pick a fights was being kept.

The wives nodded and few said yes softly and Negan then looked down at you. “Well then… I guess you were right my Queen.” He said softly as he reached down and touched his large, rough hand to the red mark on your cheek. He looked back at a group of his men who were standing in the door. “Don’t just stand there dipshits… go pick the poor stupid girl up and taking her to the Doc..” He said gesturing with Lucille before wrapping the arm holding the baseball bat around you waist pulling you roughly against him. He leaned in and whispered low in your ear.

“Don’t think just because you were justified in beating the absolute fucking shit out that girl that you will not be punished later..” His words sent a shiver through your body and you drew a sharp breath in knowing that he was going to punish you in the most sinful of ways that night.

“Yes, Sir..” You whisper softly bringing a devious smile to his lips as he began to plan ways he was going to make you beg for him that night.

Being Negan’s Wife Would include – HC – Negan/Reader

On By deathvalleyqueen666In fanfiction, Headcannon, Negan/Favorite!Wife, reader insert, The Walking DeadLeave a comment

+ You were the first woman that Negan was with both physically and emotionally after Lucille died.

+ He calls you “My Queen”

+ To Negan you are not just one of his wives… you are HIS WIFE, just like Lucille was. A real wife.

+ Negan would be extraordinarily possessive of you, he would (and has) kill a man for talking to you in a way that he found flirtatious or inappropriate.

+ You would be the only one of his wives to not have your own room at the Sanctuary, when you ask him why? He responds:

“(y/n), because you are the only woman I am going to share MY bed with, my queen only sleeps next to her king”

+ He desperately wants you to have his child and you two are actively trying to conceive.

+ He hands you Lucille to hold when he makes some sort of speech in front of all the Saviors

+ You are the only one of the wives that ever goes beyond the walls of the Sanctuary. Negan takes you with him when he returns Carl to Alexandria because he wants to show you what they have there.

+ When special items are brought in like an Ipod, books, movies or games. Negan always makes sure you have the first pick.

+ Even if he “visits” one of the other wives, he will always end up coming to sleep in the bed he shares with you because he says he can’t fall asleep with out you next to him.

+ You wear Lucille’s wedding ring.

+ Negan actually is in love with you.

No Crow Eater – SOA – Happy/Reader

On By deathvalleyqueen666In fanfiction, happy/reader, reader insert, SOALeave a comment

Summary:

Summery – After being in a relationship with Happy for almost 2 years he finally brings his girlfriend to the club and everyone is a little surprised to see how far she is from what they were expecting.

Happy x Reader

Notes:

Note: This doesn’t follow the time line all that well… I am in the middle of rewatching the series after several years of not watching it so timelines are fuzzy. It’s really just a bunch of fluffy nonsense because I needed an emotional pick me up…

Request for Anon –

I have a soa request (I’ve noticed you’ve had a lot of soa ones so sorry if you don’t want to) but maybe you’re with happy and people are confused by it because you’re so girly and nerdy and shy but he loves you a lot

It had been a little over three years since you started coming in a few times a week to help Mrs. Lowman with her errands or just to keep her company. You took the job as a home heal aid the help you put yourself through nursing school. The last thing you ever expected was to fall in love with the sweet old lady’s outlaw biker son, Happy. It crept up on you both. When you first started working for the Lowman’s you had a boyfriend, not a very good boyfriend. One with a serious temper and drug habit that was getting out of control.

You honestly didn’t think Happy thought much of you till you walked in his mother’s house one spring morning about six months after you started working for them with a black eye and busted lip. Mrs. Lowman was beside herself at the sight, she adored you, and before too long she had called her son in the room. Happy was none too thrilled to see you in such a state and that day he became your knight on shinning Harley.

What happened to your ex that day you did know, and to be honest even all these years later you had no desire to know. That day though, that day marked the change in your relationship with the Lowman’s. Within just a few weeks you and Happy had started some strange relationship.

He was so far from the type of men you normally dated and you were the furthest thing from his normal type but there was something about your odd coupling that just worked. Things became serious quickly, just six months into the relationship you moved in with Hap and his mom. Though you were together and Hap loved you dearly, he tried his best for years to keep you off of the Sons’ radar.  

Nearly two full years into the relationship, having just graduated nursing school, you got a job working at St. Thomas as a NICU nurse. It wasn’t long after that some of the members of SAMCROW put two and two together when they saw Happy pull you aside outside the hospital to have a hushed conversation. You didn’t think that it was any sort of big deal till the next Saturday rolled around.

It was your day off, you didn’t want to do much besides lay in bed and catch up on sleep but when you saw your other half standing in the doorway to your bedroom. Wearing his cut and holding a shopping bag in the other. “It’s time to get up babe…” He said with little smirk as he walked into the bedroom and set the bag on the bed.

“Nope..” You groan as you rolled over in bed and pulled a pillow over your head not wanting to even think about getting up at that moment. You felt the bed shift under Happy’s weight as he sat down. His tattoo covered hand resting on your back. “Don’t try this tender loving boyfriend bullshit..” You grumble into the mattress before peaking you head out from under the pillow.

Happy chuckled softly as he leaned down and peered at you as he lifted the pillow off your head. “You have been invited to come with me to church, like all the other guys old ladies…” He gave you half hearted smirk as you eyed him suspiciously.

As you contemplated what such an invitation meant you bit your bottom lip and eyed the bag that Hap had brought in with him. Sitting up slowly you leaned against the head board and crossed your arms in front of your chest. “I don’t belong in that world Hap…” You confess softly as you reach over on to your night stand and grab your glasses before slipping them on so you could actually see.

Happy shrugged and reached out and cupped your cheek. “You’re my girl, I fucking love you, I want us to have a life together baby.” His thumb brushed against your cheek as he spoke. “I am thinking about patching into SAMCROW, leaving this Nomad bull shit behind me. You and Mom will be protected that way if I end up back inside.” You winced at the thought of him going back to jail. You had dealt with that mess once already and you didn’t want to have to go through it again. “I need you to do this… they need to know my girl is just as committed to the club as I am… that’s the way it works baby.” Hap leaned in and gave you a kiss on your cheek before he rustled the bag in your direction.

You let out a little sigh, “Let me guess…” Hap shakes his head and smirks as he pushes the bag towards you again. “I don’t like to dress like that babe… I don’t want to look like some fucking porn star…” You complain softly as you hold the bag nervously in your hand not wanting to look inside for fear it was going to be like the last dress Hap had got you.

He leaned back and shook his head. “Just look in the bag…” he urged softly. Slowly you peaked in the bag and small smirk played on your lips as you felt the smooth, old leather of the vintage leather jacket as you pulled it from the bag. “So you can ride with me…” He said softly with a small smirk playing on his lips as he leaned in and kissed your cheek.

Happy didn’t get you gifts often. Usually only when he did something he knew upset you and usually it was flowers or the occasional piece of jewelry. This was more than just an apology. This was him making you apart of his world. As you look up at him, the jacket laid across your blanket covered lap, you grin and nod. “Okay… fine…” You chewed on your bottom lip as you smirked. “I will go play good little old lady… because I want our little life to only get better.” Hap reached out and patted your thigh over the blanket as you continued. “Don’t laugh but spending all day with those babies…” Happy couldn’t help but get this look on his face like this was not the conversation he wanted to be having at that moment. You couldn’t help but laugh. “I am not saying now… but ya know soon.” Hap chuckled as he stood up.

“(y/n), one thing at a time darling…” He never wanted to talk about having kids. It wasn’t that your relationship wasn’t at that point. It had been at that point for quite some time. It wasn’t an issue you were going to press in that moment, but soon there was going to be conversation had. You weren’t getting younger and neither was he.

You chuckle softly as you kicked the blankets off, “Tell that to your mother… every day she asks me when we are getting married… and when are we giving her a grandbaby.” Happy reached out and grasps your wrist as you walk past him to start get your clothes ready to get dressed.

As you turn around and look up at him as his eyes narrow in on you. “Do you want to get married and have kids?” He asked honestly as he let you wrist go. He looked almost worried about what your answer was going to be.

You shrug and smirk nervously. “Married… no… kids… you know I want kids.” Happy reached out and his hand brushed your hip as he took a step towards you.

“I know…” He said softly as he lifted her hand from your hip your cheek. “If they patch me into SAMCRO, we can talk about having a kid…” As he speaks a smile grows across your face and Hap couldn’t help but smirk at your happiness. He broke the tender moment when smacked your ass with his other hand. “Now please…get dressed so we can go…” He gave your ass a squeeze as he walked out of the room to let you get dressed.

It took you far longer than necessary to pick out an outfit from your clothes that would not make you stand out quite so badly as you felt like you would. A pair of tight jeans, the only pair you had left from your collage days that you had tucked away in the back of your dresser. For a top you didn’t have much that would have made any kind of statement other than the fact you were painfully nerdy on the best of days. You dug through your tank tops and pulled out the one black one you had that happened to have some reference to the Death Eaters from Harry Potter. You laughed a little but pulled it on over your head before slipping on the jacket that Hap had just got you on before you walked out of the bedroom.

Hap was sitting on the couch next to his mom who was watching TV. Her hospice nurse had just arrived so now was as good of time for you guys to leave as any. You walked over and gave her a kiss on the cheek. “Look at you…” She said softly as she took your hand . “She is too good for you…” the older woman said with a weak smile as she turned to her son. “Marry this girl and give me just one grandbaby to hold before I go… please…” You laugh as Hap shakes his head as he laughs softly before kissing his mother’s bald head.

“One of these days ma…” He said with a little smirk as he reached out and took your hand before you leave and start to head down to Charming for church.

The times that Hap had taken you out on his bike before were usually short runs. This was the longest ride you had been on and when you pulled into the parking lot of Teller – Morrow you were relived to be able to get up and walk around. As you got off the bike you looked around, there were quite a few of the guys and their wives and girlfriends there already.

Taking a deep breath you tried to calm your nerves as you pulled the helmet off your head and handed it to Hap. “I don’t belong here…” You muttered softly as you turned with a nervous look on your face, wringing your hands. Hap reached out and placed his hands on your hips.

“Babe… relax.” He said in a calm voice. “You are my girl… because of that you belong here..” He leaned up and kissed you softly. You could feel your cheeks flush. PDA’s were never your thing and the fact there was a chorus of cat calls coming from Happy’s friends just made you all the more uncomfortable. “Ignore them…” He said softly as you shook your head.

You wanted to turn tail and run, this was such a foreign world to you. You had grown up in the suburbs, the worst thing you had to witness growing up was your father being a drunk asshole. Happy didn’t lie at all when you asked him questions when he would come home late at night and head straight into the shower, which always woke you up. It took you a little bit to get used to the truth of what Hap did when he wasn’t with you. You tried not to think about this part of his life, you just focused on the life you had been working so hard to build together.

“(y/n)?” A familiar voice called out a few feet behind you. Turning around you recognized Tara right away from St. Thomas. She was one of the few surgeons that were extra kind to the NICU nurses. Tara smiled bright and had a slightly confused look on her face. Happy stood up and greeted Jax Teller.

“This your old lady?”Jax asked as he put his arm around Tara’s shoulder. Happy just nodded and you smiled nervously.

“How did I not know this? We see each other how many times a day?” Tara asked as she reached out and took your hands pulling you away from the boys to talk more. As soon as she was sure you were out of ear shot of other people Tara started to ask more questions than you had ever expected. “How long have you two been together?”

You laugh nervously. “A little over two years, I used to help take of his mom…” Tara nodded slowly. She obviously couldn’t wrap her head around how you and Happy work as a couple. You glanced back at Happy who was standing talking with a group of men and Jax.

“I would have never pictured you with Happy…” Tara said honestly as she reached out and touched your forearm causing you to look back at the one person besides Happy that you actually knew.

“He treats me good, we have a nice little house, we work…” You say softly and Tara just nods. “Him being a Nomad, I never had to come to this type of shit. He was always bouncing from place to place to do what he needed to do…” You take a long deep breath as you glance quickly back at Happy who is still deep in conversation with the boys. “Hap wants to patch into SAMCRO…”

Tara smiled and put her arm around your shoulder. “Well if that’s the case (y/n), I guess it’s time you met the rest of the girlfriends and wives” Even though you didn’t know Tara well at that point in time, you were glad to have her by your side as your navigated the world of a SAMCRO old lady. Tara made introductions to some of old ladies and few of the ‘crow eaters’ that were like vultures waiting to swoop in a patch.

One of the old ladies that you met was a very pretty blonde girl, close to your age, named Lyla. She was a sweet girl, one of the few girls who didn’t give you a funny look. Tara, Lyla and you sat on a couch quietly talking among yourselves, though you still didn’t feel like this was your world. “So you work at the hospital right?” Lyla asked brightly trying to make you feel more comfortable.

You smiled nervously and nodded. Tara reached out and placed her hand on your arm. “She is an amazing NICU nurse, really one of the best we have at St. Thomas.” Tara’s kind words make your cheeks flush crimson and Lyla smile brightly.

“That’s where they take the really sick babies and the early ones?” Lyla asked softly. She almost seemed embarrassed that she was certain about what you did at the hospital.

As you nod, you smile softly. “Yup, I spend all day with the sweetest babies..” You try and smile but your job had it’s ups and downs. Tara knew it and gave your arm a gentle squeeze. “It’s a hard job but I love it.”

Lyla smiled and nodded. “I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t do either of you girls jobs… you guys hold people’s lives in your hands… I just hold their cocks.” The three of you laughed, all be it a little uncomfortably, at her last comment.

“So.. (y/n)… you and Happy have any plans to have your own little family?” Tara asked with a coy smile that made you laugh. “I know there is that baby boom going on with the nurses… you have to be catching baby fever?”

You shrugged and glanced over at Happy who was standing behind Jax as he talked to a couple of the prospects. Letting out a long sigh you looked back at Tara. “I want kids… Ma wants us to have a baby last year… we barely started dating and the woman was demanding her first grandchild… “ You said with a softly chuckle and Tara shook her head. Lyla leaned in as you continued. “Hap, I really don’t know if he wants kids or not…I think he would a good dad. Lord help any boy that would ever think about dating our daughter though… He scared the shit out my little sister Ava’s boyfriend.” Both Lyla and Tara laughed and you just shook your head. “I thought he was gonna call the cops… really..”

“What happened?” Lyla questioned curiously and you just chuckled.

“Well this little wanna be banger my sister is dating cheated on her and she was all sorts of upset. So I told her come spend the weekend up at our place. Just get out of Stockton for a few days and come chill with big sis type deal.” You start as both women listen intently to your story. Happy glances over his shoulder and sees you three deep in conversation and gives you a little smirk. Oh you would not be smiling if you knew the story I was telling baby… You mused as you gave a little chuckle before continuing. “Hap is usually busy with club stuff on the weekend so I was so not expecting him to even be around much but my luck he is home all Friday night when she gets there and she was a wreck when she got to the house. Hap hates seeing girls cry. Like if I want to get my way with him, I turn on the water works and he will bend over backwards to make me stop.”

Tara and Lyla laughed as the both glanced over at Happy, who did not look too happy about the looks the women were giving him. “Stop..” You say quickly as your playfully swat your hand at them. “He would be so pissed if anyone knew he was such a damn softy, he has a reputation to uphold…” You scold as you nervously laugh. “Any ways… He wanted to know why Ava was so upset, and being like most 16 year old girls she just vomited all these emotions on a poor unsuspecting Happy while I got Ma comfortable in bed.” Tara’s hand quickly covered her mouth to stifle a laugh picturing the moment in her mind. “By the time I come out of Ma’s room… Hap is headed into our bedroom to get his fucking gun saying he is gonna go put the fear of God into this little shit.”

“Opie would the same thing.” Lyla admitted with small laugh.

“I was nervous as shit, but I got them both to calm down before Hap got to the door and trust me it wasn’t an easy task.” You were enjoying being able to tell this story honestly. Most people would hear that your boyfriend went to go get one of a small arsenal of weapons that he kept hidden under your bed in shoe boxes and question your sanity for being with that man. Here these women got what it was like to love the same type of man you did and understand what it was like. It was a moment of liberation that you never knew you needed. ”But I got them both to calm down. I got Happy to put on a movie to watch with Ava while I made dinner… well no sooner did I get that shit done did Ava’s little shit head boyfriend show up at our fucking door.” Tara started shaking her head.

“How did he manage to get the address.. your mom?” Tara asked with a great deal of concern in her voice knowing that this story was not going end well for this little boyfriend.

“No, my dumb shit sister..” You said with a heavy sigh and both women groaned. “Yup… she texted it to him and said that if he thought he was so big and tough he should come see the guy I was with…” Tara shook her head and tisked softly. “Girl tell me about it… When I got that door you know what that little boy said to me…” You paused and took a deep breath for dramatic effect, you were getting very into recounting this tale and your small audience was loving watching you come out of your shell a little. “He said ‘Bitch.. lets see this bad mother fucker you with.’ I couldn’t even say anything because as soon as he said the word ‘bitch’ Hap flew off that couch and had that kid by the throat no sooner than he finished speaking.” Both Tara and Lyla were shaking their heads and you just gave a small nod.

“I didn’t expect Happy to take that well.” Tara said softly and you just nodded your head as you reached over and took a small drink of your rum and coke.

“He was livid. The kid was terrified. His uncle is in the Grim Bastards or something like that… I don’t know these club names and stuff… but, he had no idea I was with someone in the Sons.” Lyla let out a heavy sigh. “The poor kid about pissed himself when he saw Happy’s cut. Needless to say he now treats my little sister like a princess.” You said with this self satisfied smirk. Both of the other women smiled brightly as they leaned in and the three of you continued to converse as the guys went into the side room to have ‘Church’.

By the end of the night you felt far more at ease than you had ever anticipated. Tara and Lyla had made you feel like you had been friends for years. As you and Hap were getting ready to leave an older woman, who Tara had pointed out to your earlier as Gemma, the would be Queen of SAMCRO, came walking over to you and Hap. “(y/n)…. Right?” She said pleasantly trying to catch you both before leaving.

“Yes,” You said nervously, Gemma was a formidable woman. She had a good six inches on you even without her heals and when she spoke to you, she commanded your attention.

Gemma reached out and placed her hand on your. “We were so glad to have you come out tonight… Tara said you had a good time with her and Lyla.” You glanced back at Happy who put his hand on your shoulder as you nodded. “Well that’s good sweetheart because I hope to see you back next weekend, we are gonna do a pot luck at my house before..” Gemma glanced over at Happy for fleeting second before turning her gaze back to you. “Can you bake? We need someone to bring a desert?”

You laughed nervously and glanced back at Happy. “Sure..” You say as you immediately curse yourself, because you were a horrible baker and two if you brought a store bought desert you knew that you would never hear the end of it. Happy squeezed your shoulder and shot you a glance that made you even more nervous but Gemma seemed to either not notice or not care.

She smiled brightly and patted your forearm. “Good, it’s about damn time Happy settled down with a nice girl..” She said her goodnights as you and Hap turned to leave.

Your long time boyfriend leaning in and whispering in your ear. “Baby girl… the last cake you made was burnt on the outside and raw on the inside…” He said with a little laugh before opening the door as you walked out into the cool evening air.

“I am gonna pay Ava to come bake a cake…” You divulged with a giggle that made Happy shake his head and chuckle as he handed you guys set off on your journey home.

In the weeks that followed you did manage to make a good impression with your kid sister’s cake and much to your surprise found yourself a second family in the women of SAMCRO. It was late one night nearly a month and half from the night that you had first been introduced to Happy’s other family, Ma had been in bed for hours, and you were stretched across the couch waiting for Hap to get back from ‘club stuff’ was all his text told you.

The last text you had gotten from him was nearly two hours ago and there was a small part of you that was frozen in fear that something horrible had happened. The more you were learning about the life that you had gotten yourself into with Happy from your new friends Tara and Lyla the more you found yourself waiting each night on the couch. Praying that you would hear the sound of Happy’s bike as he drove down the street finally making his way home. Each night a wave of relief washed over you as you started to hear the faint rumble echoing down the near silent side street.

Sitting up on the couch, you were perched, waiting for Happy to walk in the door. Your heart raced as you heard him fumble with his keys as he walked through the door taking something from the pocket of his jeans and tucking it into one of the pockets on his cut as he walked through the door. “Hey babe…” He said calmly as Hap tossed his keys on a the side table by the door. Slipping his cut off as he walked into the living room he held it in his hands before laying it across your lap.

You gazed up at Happy with a puzzled look on your face. “Look in the pocket…” he instructed and you couldn’t help but be slightly panicked as you slipped your hand into the pocket and fished out what looked to be a black infant’s hat with the Reaper logo on it folded in half. You instantly started to panic. You had only learned that you were expecting a baby the day before when you had Tara pull a set of labs on you after a few days of constantly getting sick and time you ate. A pregnancy test was always standard fair and you were as shocked as anyone when it came back positive. You hadn’t even begun to think of how you were going to broach the subject with Happy, but apparently Tara said something to Jax and well you didn’t have to worry about that now.

As you unfolded the hat your hands shook. Once the little black hat was open in your lap your saw two thin patches with the words “Redwood” and “Original” embroidered on them, held together by a simple silver ring. Your heart started to race as you lifted your eyes to meet Hap’s. “before you say anything… Tara thought you would have told me right away so don’t be mad at her for telling Jax.” Happy cautioned knowing you all too well. “The vote was tonight and even before Jax said anything about the baby they voted me in… unanimously.” He said with a little smirk. Your hands clutched the little hat and the patches as you smiled brightly.

“Hap, I was going to tell you tonight…” You started slowly and Hap gave you an understanding nod. Slipping the ring off the patches before you lifted it up and raised a questioning eyebrow. “and this?” Hap smirked and shrugged. “Did you just propose to me with a shrug?” Hap smirked and nodded his head. You looked at the simple ring and chuckled. “You got like the cheapest fucking ring…”

Hap shook he head and sat down on the couch next to you putting his arm around your shoulder. “I got the cheap ring because kids are expensive as shit…” He said with a laugh as he leaned and kissed your cheek. “We are gonna need a bigger place, the three of us can’t stay in that tiny ass room baby. The kid gonna need clothes and diapers…” You started to chuckle as he sounded increasingly more nervous as he rattled of all the added expenses the baby was going to bring.

“You are SAMCRO now baby, they make good money… I mean Tara and Jax have that nice house..” You pointed out and Happy shook his head as he leaned over and kissed the side of your head.

Letting out a long sigh he leaned back. “Being in SAMCRO doesn’t mean we get to live like kings now. If anything things are going to tighter with this baby and moving. We gotta figure out what we are going to do with mom. She can’t afford this place on her own.” His hand reached out and rested on your stomach as you settled against him resting your head on his shoulder.

“We are going to figure it out Hap, we always do baby..” You ran your fingers over the embroidered letters and took a long deep breath knowing that those simple words, that should have meant nothing but meant everything was going to change in your little world for your little family.  

Future!Negan Greeting his Wife and Daughter in the Gardens

On By deathvalleyqueen666In fanfiction, Negan/Favorite!Wife, reader insert, The Walking DeadLeave a comment

The war was long, bloody and in the end you saw your husband’s empire crumble. You were terrified of the fate that would befall you and Lily when it was all over and Rick had you and your daughter brought to Alexandria. Negan was being held prisoner for his crimes and Rick said that was the only kindness he was going to show your husband, letting him live. You couldn’t go back to the Sanctuary, it would never be safe for you or Lily there again. Rick extended one more kindness, allowing you and Lily to live in Alexandria, with all the safety and protection that came with living there.

It was more than just having a safe place for your daughter, it was also the ability to still see your husband, for Lily to still see her father, even if it was behind bars. The first year in Alexandria was difficult. No one trusted you, no one showed you any real kindness beyond not being cruel to your daughter who surprisingly enough became good friend’s with Rick’s little girl Judith. It was that friendship she shared with the young Grimes girl that eventually softened the community and Rick to your presence.

After nearly 5 years of your husband being fairly confined to his small, dark, cell you manged to convince Rick and Daryl to let Negan spend time with you and your daughter. “Think of it like parole, he has been down there for five years. Lily is almost 7 years old and can count the times she remembers hugging her father on one hand. I know what he did was wrong but he is still my husband and I know he is a good man deep down, please let him be with us so you can see this.” Rick and Daryl looked at each other then back at you.

Rick took a step forward and placed a kind hand on your arm. “(y/n), I want to believe you, I really do but this is Negan we are talking about. People still remember the things he did.” Rick had actually become a very close person to you over the years, he filled a watchful almost protective big brother role than you never quite knew you needed in your life before then. He had only known you without Negan, scared always running to him in those early days begging to go see your husband. In his own was Rick helped break that dependency you had on needing Negan to always protect you, Rick taught you how to protect yourself.

Daryl took a step back and crossed his arms. “I still think we should have killed him, I am sorry to say it, (y/n) I like you and the tiny terror, but this has bad idea written all over it.” Your heart sinks at his words.

“Please, guys… give me one week to show you he will be a model citizen in Alexandria. We won’t bother anyone, you can put him to work any way or place you want.” You pleaded with such great passion that neither man could look you in the eyes. Rick glanced back at Daryl who gave a heavy sigh and slow nod.

Rick turned back to you and smiled softly. “One week… and I swear (y/n) one fucking toe out of line and this is done. He is back in that cell and we never have this discussion again.” You smile brightly and throw your arms around Rick’s neck and kiss his bearded face.

“Thank you so much! I fucking love you!” You were so excited and in truth this was the happiest either man had seen you. You rush over to Daryl who puts his hands up as you are about to throw your arms around him and just leans in and gives you a soft peck on the cheek.

“It’s for the tiny terror… not you… not him… her.” Daryl explained and you smiled brightly at him nevertheless. It didn’t matter to you why he said yes, only that he did. You say a quick goodbye and Rick said he would let you know when they got Negan all situated to be released.

+++++++

The next morning there was a soft knock on the front door as you made breakfast. Your little girl, who was now 7, jumped up from the table where she had been sitting reading a book and raced towards the door. You hadn’t told Lily about finally being able to see her father, she was always such a happy child. “I got it Mom!” She hollered as she raced down the hall. You momentarily stop cutting up some fruit and watch as Lily opens the door. It’s Judith with Rick standing behind her. Your heart flutters with excitement, ‘Of course he has Judith come get Lily… she probably insisted upon it more likely.’ You muse softly as you set down the knife on the counter before wiping your hands and joining your daughter at the door.

The girls hug each other tightly as was their custom since they were little more than toddlers. “I got a surprise for you and your mom Lils..” Judith said brightly with a large grin on her face. Neither child really knew the horrors that had happened during the war, all the lives lost. You had told Lily her father had done some bad things and Negan always reiterated the same on their rare visits.

You smile up at Rick and nod down to the girls. Rick shrugs. “She wouldn’t let me come by myself…” You chuckle softly as you shake your head noticing Judith starting to pull Lily out the front door.

“Hey… hold up girls. Lily, get your shoes on please.” You say in your ‘mom voice’ that has become more and more your regular voice over the last few years. Lily was a headstrong and stubborn child. On more than one occasion you cursed the fact that Negan was her father because she possessed so much of his willfulness and worst of all she had her father’s charm. There was a reason the Daryl called her ‘the tiny terror’ a nickname that even her father took a small amount of delight in when you told him.

Lily huffed as she plopped to the floor and scooted over slipping her canvas tennis shoes on over her bare feet. “No socks?” Rick said raising an eyebrow at your daughter.

“No time Uncle Rick… no time.” The young girl said with a tone of great seriousness in her voice that made both you and Rick chuckle. No sooner were her shoes on then the girls were out the door, hand in hand, Judith leading the way at a furious pace.

Rick gestured for you to follow and you slipped on a pair of flip flops and closed the front door of your home as you both joined the girls at much more leisurely pace. “She won’t know what to do with herself…” You confide softly. “She was barely a baby when everything happened.”

“It’s better that way, she won’t ever have to know.” Rick and you shared a soft smile as you continued to walk. You knew what he was doing was not something he wanted to do but it was the right thing, the thing that Carl would have done.

As you approach the garden you spot Negan right away, leaning down his hands in the earth. You can’t help but smile seeing him do something that a few years earlier you would have seen as so below your husband. He barely looked like the man who once controlled a small empire. Then again you looked nothing like the woman you were either.

You heart raced as you looked down at the pale blue sundress you were wearing, so different from the tight black dresses of your old life. Then you glance up and your husband wearing a simple plaid shirt over a white t-shirt and a well warn pair of jeans and how you looked suddenly didn’t matter. You’re eyes were fixed on your daughter as she stopped in her tracks, letting go of her best friend’s hand at the sight of her father.

Her little hands covered her mouth as it hung open and tears began to fall. “Daddy?” She asked softly, her voice muffled through her hands. Judith wrapped her arms around her best friend with a big smile on her face. Negan looked up from his work and smiled brightly at his daughter. “Daddy!” Lily screamed with joy as she practically pushed Judith off of her and raced towards her father tears still streaming down her face as she leapt into his waiting arms.

You had only seen Negan smile as brightly as he was as he held your not so little girl in his arms for the first time in five years, the very first time you placed her in his arms. “Well hello to you too princess,” he greeted her as he gave her a kiss on the cheek.

“Is this real daddy?” Lily asked softly in his arms and Negan gave a nod. Lily wrapped her arm’s tightly around her father’s neck, never wanting to let go of him again. “I am so happy I finally have my daddy..” she cried happily as her father kissed her tear stained cheeks.

“Me too sweetheart,” He glanced up to finally see you standing at the end of the row. Your eyes meet and your heart begins to race, suddenly it was like all the time you were kept apart melted away. Negan kissed the top of Lily’s head as he set her down.

“Where are you going daddy?” Lily asked looking up at him wide eyed.

Negan smirked down at her and leaned down as if he was telling her a great secret. “I can’t not go say hello to your mother… right?” He asked and Lily gave an enthusiastic nod.

Parts of you wanted to race right into his arms and just feel his arms around you, but there was another part that was still so nervous that you stood frozen in disbelief as he walked towards you. Rick walked towards the girls giving you some modicum of privacy, even though there was a small crowd starting to gather to see if the whispers really were true.

Negan didn’t say as word as he finally closed the gap between you, he only reached out taking you face in his hands. “(y/n),” he whispered softly as he leaned his forehead against yours, your hands shakily find their way to his face, now covered with a thick salt and pepper beard. “My beautiful, strong, wife…” Negan leaned into your tentative touch as he leaned in and captured your lips with his. It had felt like a life time since you had felt the feel of his lips on your own. It was like a vivid dream more than it felt like reality in that moment. His hands trailed from your face, entangling in your hair as he pulled you deeper into the kiss you both had dreamt about for 5 long years.

You gently stroke his bearded cheek as her pulls back and you smile. “I fucking missed you so much.” You say, you voice shaking from the pure emotion surging through your veins. Negan pulled you in a tight hug, you arms wrapped tightly around his chest as you softly sobbed into his chest. “Don’t you ever fucking think about putting me thought this hell ever the fuck again. I can’t do it..” Negan hushed you as he shifted his weight rocking you back and forth slightly.

“Never, never the fuck again my Queen.” He said adamantly as your eyes locked on each other. “All that matters is my girls… nothing else. I will do anything to have my girls back…”

Lily came running over to you both and wedged herself into the hug causing you and Negan to both chuckle softly. “Yes Princess?” Negan said smoothing her wild curls.

“Uncle Rick…” Lily started which in return made Negan look at you with a great deal of disbelief before he mouthed the words ‘Uncle Rick’ to you a little shocked and you just shrugged. He then mouthed ‘We are talking about this later’ to you before turning back to Lily who had still been talking. “Invited me to go fishing with him and Judith, I said I had to ask my mom and Dad “ She said ‘dad’ with such a huge grin on her little face. “first… but Uncle Rick..” Negan shuttered again at the sound of his daughter referring to the man that imprisoned him for the last five years as ‘Uncle’. “said that you and mom would probably want alone time… which I think means dad is gonna do ya right.. that’s so what Enid told me.” She said with a silly little girl not really knowing what she really meant by the phrase.

“Hold the fuck up cupcake… what did you just say” Negan said fairly shocked. “I could momentarily over look the whole ‘Uncle Rick’ thing… but eh eh, you are too little to be even guessing at that the fuck you just said.” Negan leaned down and looked your daughter square in the eyes. “Listen… you don’t need to know what adult alone time is till you are thirty.” He kissed her forehead and ruffled her unruly curls. “But yes… go fishing with Uncle Prick..” You give him a wide eyed stare and kick his shin angered with his little slip up. “Fuck… Uncle RICK … damn it woman it’s bad enough she calls him Uncle sorry if old habits die hard but he has kept me locked in a cell for five years my dear, my darling wife” Lily giggled watching your exchange.

“Rick has been very kind… and he cares a great deal about our daughter… so shut it.” You say sternly in the same tone you take when you are giving Lily a stern talking to about the latest trouble she had managed to get herself in with Judith.

Negan smirked at your stern voice never having heard you take that aggressive tone with him before. “Yes ma’am.” He said with slightly devious smirk that just made you shake your head. Something will never change. You muse.

You turn down to your daughter, “Lily remember to be on your best behavior, be polite and make sure to thank Rick and Michonne for being nice enough to include you.” Lily nods and you glance up at Negan who is trying not to smile so much watching you be a mother to the child you shared. He missed so much of these moments that each little thing you did just reminded him how lucky he was. Which Rick had really beat into him the night before, not literally but it was close enough.

“Yes mama,” Lily said softly.

“And make sure you stay close to the grown ups, cupcake. I know you probably know a lot about the world out there baby but it’s still very dangerous.” Negan added reaching down and patting her cheek.

“I know daddy, I promise.” Lily wrapped her arms around your husband’s arm tightly and Negan leaned down and kissed the top of her head.

“Just be safe ok, I just got my girls back.” He pulled you both into a tight hug. Lily started to squirm having enough of this family bonding moment, she was ready to go be a normal little kid playing with her friend.

You and Negan goodbye to Lily one more time with hugs, kisses and several more reminders from you to be on her best behavior which made your husband continually having to stifle chuckles at the notion that your daughter was a mischievous little thing. One Lily was safely off with Rick and Judith to meet up with Michonne. Negan slung his arm around your shoulder and looked at the rebuilt Alexandria. “Which one of these Mc Mansions is our little corner of suburban heaven?” Negan grinned broadly as you leaned into him relishing in the feeling of his strong arms around you once more.

“It’s down the little street by the church..” You say pointing in the general direction of your home. “It was one of the few homes not completely ruined by the fires…” You say glaring at your husband’s face drops a little.

“They are never going to let me live any of it down?” He asks softly showing a rare venerable side. You lean into him and sigh softly.

“It’s been a long enough road for them to accept me. Some of them still don’t care for me much but only put up with me because Lily is such a charming girl. Everyone adores her here.” You take his hand and start to walk with him towards the sidewalk to take him to show him the home he had never step foot in. You thought back to the first time that you walked this street with your husband, many years ago not long after giving birth to your daughter. “Do you remember when you brought me here?” You ask looking up at your husband with a little grin dancing on your lips.

He smirked and nodded. “I do my love, I do indeed.”

“You walked me down this street.” You picked his arm up and draped it over your shoulder which made him laugh. “I was about 2 inches taller then… you know heels and all..” you said with a little laugh and Negan paused and leaned down, kissing you deeply.

As he pulled back he smirked “You are still just as beautiful… maybe more.” You laugh softly and shake your head as you urge him to continue walking.

“That may be true… but you told me this place is the type of place you raise a kid. You talked about how we needed a house in the suburbs for the baby, so we could grow our family the right way.” Your face had a look of great sadness spread across it at the thought of the lost years with your family, there were many time that you told Rick that killing Negan would have been kinder to all three of you. Though now you knew that wasn’t the case.

Negan kissed the top of your head. “It obviously has been, the squirt is beautiful…”

“She is a god damn handful Negan.” You cut him off bursting his bubble about his perfect daughter. “She is a good kid babe, but she is wild. She needs her father. To be quite honest I needed you out more to help with Lily than I needed you for myself…” Your voice cracks softly as you speak the frustration of being a married-single mother for the last five years starting to show as your inched closer to your door.

As you both climbed the steps the home you were going to share Negan stopped you as you went to open the door. “Listen to me, (y/n), Daddy is home… it’s time for my Queen…to take a break.” You shook your head and laughed as you pushed open the door. Before you had a chance to step over the threshold Negan put a hand on your shoulder. “You know… we never had a home really before. So I never bothered to do this, but it’s about fucking time I did.” He scooped you up in his arms as your let out a roar of laughter.

“If you throw out your fucking back…” You start through your laughter.

“Oh I know my wife did not just call me old. I know that shit did not happen.” He joked as he carried you across the threshold and into your home. You had spent a lot of time making it a home. As Negan set you down you noticed him stopping to admire the home you made. Photos were rare, but there was one of Lily when she was just three years old sitting in a front of a rose bush that he had noticed on the way up the steps to the house. He took a few steps over the picture and looked at it for a solid minute in silence before finally he spoke. “I missed so much, really how well does she ever know me…”

You shake your head and beckon for him to follow you as you walk up the stairs towards the bedrooms on the second floor. “Oh, she knows her daddy…” you say as you push open Lily’s bedroom door. Negan joins you and see’s his old leather jacket laying across the foot of his daughter’s soft blue bed spread. “Rick gave me that about a month after we came here, I was so upset, so lost. I just missed you so much. He didn’t know if it would help but he knew how important it was for a child to have something to remind them of a loved one who may not be there any more.” You pause and turn to your husband. “So Rick told me about Carl’s hat… the one Judith has now.”

Negan let out a heavy sigh thinking about the young man who died before his time. “Fucking shame, still rips me up the kid was taken out by a god damn bitter…”

“Yeah, Carl deserved so much better. He was a good kid.” You let you a heavy sigh as you continue. “Lily was still so little at the time but when I was sad or lonely, missing you… I would sit with her in my lap and tell her stories about how you built a kingdom to protect me, how you saved me so early on from a heard of biters.” You reach out and touch his face. “How her daddy was strong and brave, how he loved her, his little princess so much that he went to war when he thought someone was going to possibly cause her harm..” You look up at him through your long lashes and smile a slightly sad smile. “She knows the man I saw, the man I know you are. She knows you did bad things because you thought they were right. She loves you, she fucking adores you… you always have been her father..” You reach up and cup his cheek once more looking deep into his eyes. “Please don’t disappoint her again.”

“I won’t.”